The Golden Horde
by Persnikitty
Summary: Hated by the village and his own teammates, Naruto is manipulated into becoming a willing medical experiment. AU with some Canon elements. Psychological aspects and heavy rationalizations. Mature content and themes.
1. Bad apples fall somewhere

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

Haruno Sakura was not born to be Uzumaki Naruto's personal torturer; it was something she became through a series of partially related circumstances. Despite her rather heavy handed treatment and brutal physical abuse of her blonde team mate, she was not intrinsically a bad person.

Prior to entering Konoha's Shinobi Academy, her life was one of torment from the other children who would harshly ridicule her wide forehead, bubblegum pink hair and her hitching stutter when their words became too much and she would break down in body wracking tears. For two years she struggled to change their view of her with abysmal results until a very pretty blonde girl chose to become her friend.

Sakura would have eventually grown up to be a very self-conscious, shy, introverted bookworm, most probably a typical soft-spoken librarian and a much milder version of her mother. But then she met Ino. Unknown to her, Ino had read in one of her mom's magazines that female groups of friends always include the super pretty one and the smart but ugly one. While Sakura wasn't necessarily ugly, at best cute, Ino figured that with that broad forehead, she was most likely smart.

Ino's first order of business was the beat down Sakura's tormentors and then began the task of convincing Sakura that she was worthy of Ino's friendship, which was no easy feat. The years of verbal abuse and debasement had left a five-year old girl with a very negative body image, low self-esteem and a sense of personal loathing.

Things quickly turned around in Sakura's life, since Ino was the leader of the Cool Crowd and was very protective of her Personal Projects, namely Sakura. It was Ino who imparted one of her secrets to Sakura: when attacked, give your attackers another target. That's when she met a blonde boy in tattered clothes, dirty hair and a grime covered face picking through the Haruno trash bins.

A group of her detractors, led by Ami (Ino's rival for the Cool Crowd leadership), had found where she lived and were waiting to mess her up. To escape their beating and harassment, she pointed to the blonde street urchin and shouted at him, drawing the group's attention to the boy. He looked up with a fearful, startled expression, his bright blue eyes wide, and turned to run when Ami tackled him to the ground.

Some time during the beating, Sakura got pulled into Ami's group to help restrain and hurt the boy. Ami had stated that she wasn't going to let up until the boy begged for mercy, but he stayed unnaturally silent during the entire affair except for the occasional grunt when his damaged chest would get kicked.

About an hour later, Ami's group grew tired, hungry and left, telling the silently bleeding boy that he better be there when they get back, or he would regret it the next time they met. Ami even gave Sakura a smile as she left, saying she was alright in her books. That level of acceptance, not to mention the strange thrill at trying to make someone suffer like she had, was the first circumstance.

Despite the severity of his wounds, when Sakura turned back to the alley, the boy had vanished.

The second circumstance emerged after the all-female Cool Crowd would meet in the park by the Yamanaka Flower Shop to discuss clothes, new diets, local gossip and boys. During those times, Sakura came to enjoy the positive attention as the other girls, even Ino, would hang on her every word.

While Ino's dad was on the Village Council, he was part of the Shinobi faction made up of clan leaders and military organization heads. Sakura's mom, however, was part of the Civilian faction, a privilege granted due to her position as Head Librarian with oversight of the public library branches, Shinobi Academy library, Hospital Library, and the Civilian Academy libraries. In addition, she chaired the Civilian Textbook Selection Committee.

The elder Haruno not only had considerable clout but also access to the juiciest gossip, second only to the head of the Mercantile Guild, and was rather loose tongued when it came to her favorite and only child. This was especially true when she was deep in her cups and pumped for information.

Sakura could command attention in everything but boys. That was Ino's area as she had easy access to males their age, especially if they were from Shinobi clans or families due to her father's Council position and his status as member of the famous Ino-Shika-Chou team. But Sakura had met one boy, the one beaten behind her house earlier in the year.

She hadn't actually seen him again, but finally was able to fit a name to the face. That boy was Uzumaki Naruto, a name that made her mother's mouth twist in distaste. Very little was known of him and even less spoken, but of late he was a celebrity of sorts, though all accounts were very confusing.

The story she heard from her mother was something out of a novel. It was one of many flavors which had been floating around the political arenas.

A few weeks prior, the Cloud Ambassador had kidnapped Hyuuga Hiashi's eldest daughter, Hinata. It was done on the same day as the treaty signing ceremony for a cease-fire, signaling an end to hostilities in the two-year old secret war, during the late-night festivities. By the time the Hyuugas found them, five-year old Hinata was asleep in one of the northern training grounds, heavily sedated but alive and whole. The Ambassador was found twenty yards away, missing his right leg below the knee.

He reportedly sneered at them, claimed Diplomatic Immunity, demanded hospital care and a replacement leg from the Hyuuga family, and promised revenge on the little blonde boy with red eyes. His injuries proved to be more extensive than originally thought and he died from internal and external bleeding before the rescue party reached the hospital.

Though Cloud blamed the Hyuugas for the Ambassador's death, which ultimately would lead to Hyuuga Hizashi's martyrdom, rumor was the real killer was the demon child, Uzumaki Naruto. There had been late-night, torch-lit hunts for the boy for causing pain to the Hyuuga Clan through the death of Hyuuga Hiashi's younger twin brother.

So she casually mentioned to Ami, and the rest of the group, that she had actually met Naruto several times. He would come to her house, stand in the alley, and beg her for dates. When the others showed disbelief, she simply asked Ami what the blonde boy had been doing in Sakura's alley the day Ami beat him.

When the girls compared stories and descriptions and it was shown that the blonde boy seen that day in Sakura's alley was the infamous Uzumaki Naruto, Sakura used her new-found popularity and deftly took Ami's position as Ino's Vice President. Then, using skills learned from her mother's Council gossip sessions and making a bid for the Presidency, stated she always refused and would hit him for even thinking of cutting in on Uchiha Sasuke's territory, personally turning the conversation to their new favorite topic: the youngest son of the Uchiha clan head.

Ino forgave the attempted coup at her position and the implication that _her _future husband was actually seeing Sakura, granting her Project leniency. That day, the Cool Crowd was disbanded, and the Official Uchiha Sasuke Fan Club was born.

Whenever Sakura's Sasuke-clout would wane, she would mention Naruto tossing rocks at her bedroom window, begging for denied dates, even serenading her once in a manner which made alley cats run, all in an attempt to get between her and Sasuke. None of it was true, but that didn't matter since none of it could be refuted or verified.

She had repeated it often enough that she came to believe it to be true. Naruto did know Sakura's name, face and unique hair color, and avoided her and her block at all costs. He didn't remember much of that beating, which might have been the multiple concussions, but he did recall the pain and the pink hair. He never forgot that particular association.

The final circumstance which cemented Haruno Sakura's treatment of Uzumaki Naruto in the future was her mother, Yurinoki. Sakura quickly learned to read her mother's moods, and one of the most prevalent was anger and resentment whenever Sakura would mention the blonde street rat, or when Council business would touch on the boy. So Sakura surmised that the Uzumaki had caused her mother pain at some point in the past, and was somehow using that memory to hurt her. No one hurt Sakura's mother and got away with it, nobody!

The theory was born out whenever Sakura would ask about her father, which she rarely did. All she knew was that he was part of the civilian militia, he was dead, he died defending the village five years ago, and he fought alongside the Fourth Hokage. He was a hero and listed on the Memorial Stone, and that it was a very touchy subject, even now.

Somehow, that Naruto boy had something to do with it. Sakura took it as her personal mission to find out what and to punish him for hurting her family and making her mother cry. When she voiced such, she got the warmest smile she had ever received from her mother. Sakura was so swept up, she failed to notice the calculating glint in her mother's eye.

Then a week later, Yurinoki met Sakura at home and gave her the best news _ever_: she was enrolled in the Shinobi Academy and not only would she start next month, but would be in the same class as Uchiha Sasuke. Not just in the same grade or even the same peer group, but the actual classroom, maybe even being on the same aisle or possible the chair to his left, closest to his heart.

Sakura had promptly fainted at the possible implications. When she awoke, her mother informed her that it took a lot of string pulling to land her in that particular class, since it was mostly filled with not only kids from true shinobi families, but also the main heirs to all the clans on the Shinobi Council. Sakura would be one of a very select few which were from civilian families. But her little girl was worth it, not to mention it would make it easier to fulfill her personal mission.

Sakura's eyes gleamed at the thought of not only being physically closer to Sasuke-kun, but also being able to avenge their family's loss.

Yurinoki made Sakura swear never to speak of their arrangements; knowing how to keep secrets was crucial to being a good shinobi, after all. She also dangled the carrot that if Sakura came across any information on Uzumaki Naruto or could describe anything verifiably done to him or by him, she might be able to secure Sakura extra lessons, private tutors, class credits and advanced materials to improve her odds at being the kind of kunoichi to catch Sasuke's eye and gain his hand.

A strong Uchiha man would need a strong and capable woman, and if Sakura was willing to keep her dear mother informed, she would help Sakura be that woman.

* * *

Uchiha Sasuke was, quite simply, a complicated person. Slave to his emotions but deathly afraid of being used by them. Respecting strength but taking it as a personal insult if another was stronger. Afraid of being alone but even more afraid of loved ones used as bargaining chips. He was one of many and then, suddenly, by himself.

He wasn't always a complete bastard. He used to laugh and play, he had fellow Uchiha friends, mostly cousins, and cherished them. He did struggle for his father's attention and was hip-deep in a sibling rivalry with his much older brother, Itachi, although rivalry was too strong a word given how one-sided most of their battles were.

Itachi was a believer in Life Lessons and would often use his younger brother for practical applications. If Sasuke scored a bulls eye during shuriken practice, Itachi would blur into being some twenty yards behind him with his back turned, and would not only knock out Sasuke's shuriken but would create the letter L, for Loser, in the center of the target. Same for kunai practice. Same for Taijutsu kata drills, the mirrored L-shaped welt (so Sasuke would see it on his reflection) on Sasuke's forehead, courtesy of finger pokes and an active Sharingan.

The few times Sasuke let slip a dream or secret plan, Itachi would either do it first, perfectly; set Sasuke up for public humiliation; or would simply tell everyone. That particular Lesson taught Sasuke to keep everything close to the vest.

But the absolutely worst thing, second only to the Massacre, was the one time Itachi went into the village with Sasuke. Sasuke was not allowed outside the clan compound walls without an adult, and since thirteen-year old Itachi was not only a shinobi (technically an adult) but also an ANBU, Sasuke could only go into the village with Itachi.

For the incident in question, Itachi, normally the epitome of grace, precision and poise, somehow lost all coordination - staggering and clumsy - and ended up knocking Sasuke into poles, pushed him into carts, dropped him into puddles and sent him careening backwards into female public baths. After several hours of being bumped around, Itachi knocked him face first in the dirt at a park near the Yamanaka Flower Shop in the center of a particular group of girls Sasuke's age.

Every one of them were somehow wearing shirts with Sasuke's face on the front and his Uchiha Fan boxer-clad butt on the back. And then, _then_, darling brother Itachi drawled out, "So you must be Ino-chan. Sasuke-chan talks of you often in his sleep."

Two days later, the Shinobi Academy started.

A month later, Uchiha Itachi carved his way into forensic history with the near complete extermination of the Uchiha Clan, including non-Uchiha workers, retainers, field hands and visitors. The only person who was inside the compound walls when it began who lived was Itachi himself.

The only other survivor was Sasuke who was very late getting home: He had been chased by his Official Fan Club, the members clamoring for him to sign the Sasuke shirts they wore while they were still wearing them, when he crossed paths with two other Official Fan Clubs at a market crossroads. During the resulting brouhaha, he had almost made his escape when all the females present decided to set aside their differences, temporarily, for the common good. Which meant Sasuke's shirt. And possibly pants. Dibs on the Uchiha Fan boxers.

In the days that followed, he and they thought his Combined Fan Club had saved his life. In reality, Itachi had been waiting for several hours for Sasuke to show up, not to kill him, but to condition him for later. He needed Sasuke to activate his Sharingan, evolve it, and then come for him. The emotions behind Sasuke's eventual vengeance-fueled confrontation were important and took careful planning even at this early phase.

So as their parents slowly cooled in their bedroom suite, he enjoyed a medium-rare strip of prime imported Grass Country beef with garlic stuffed mushrooms and a saucer of vintage, extremely rare Whirlpool sake. Whirlpool was lost to a combination of natural disasters and Earth Country invasions, the former capital now resting close to half a mile off the far eastern coast of Earth under two hundred feet of water and fifty feet of volcanic slag. It was good sake.

Once Sasuke arrived, Itachi promptly placed him in a Sharingan-based illusion. In this illusion, Sasuke got to watch Itachi kill everyone in slow motion about fifty times in a row, complete with sound and tactile emphasis. And then it was repeated, only with Sasuke taking Itachi's place. The next variant had everyone wearing their mother's face while Sasuke and Itachi slid their blades through each body.

Outside of the illusion, while a shirtless Sasuke soiled himself and whimpered, Itachi careful constructed a series of hypnotic suggestions, commands and activation keywords. He needed Sasuke to be cold, bitter and arrogant, scorning everyone. For the proper emotional stew, it was crucial for Sasuke to internalize everything and never _ever_ vent.

When Itachi was finished, he activated the first keyword phrase with special emphasis on 'foolish,' 'hate,' and 'unsightly.' Then he picked up his packed bags, went outside to set the timed flare (so someone would find Sasuke before he starved to death or dehydrated from drooling), and quietly slipped away.

In the months afterwards, Sasuke became quiet, cool and cold. He was dark and brooding, somber and mysterious and it drove his fan club crazy. Ironically, it was the self-appointed leaders and rivals Yamanaka Ino and Haruno Sakura, and their squeals, which planted the seeds of his eventual misogyny. In later years when he would mention his need to rebuild the Uchiha clan, he spoke not in the context of multiple wives or the Clan Restoration Act, but clan supported breeders, little more than livestock, their worth measured in heirs.

A further cause of his personality shift and deterioration was insomnia from nightmares and a growing dependency on sleeping pills. Given the emotional roller coaster and his instant celebrity, even at age six he had no problems with legally acquiring prescription sleep aids and muscle relaxants. The village's hero worship stemming from his personal tragedy did precious little to actually help him, eventually causing almost as much harm as done by Itachi, with proportional resentment and rage.

He was smart, talented, and while in class, usually drugged. When given verbal exams, even glazed over he could give correct and succinct answers. He would never volunteer any extra information beyond which to correctly answer the question. For written tests, however, he wouldn't even sign his name. He would just sneer, flip the paper over and brood over steepled fingers. He and the teachers knew his test paper would be switched with another and he could never summon the energy to care. At least not at the beginning.

It was through the tests, however, that he discovered his rival and probably the best route towards evolving his Sharingan once he could activate it. That part was very difficult without other Uchihas to coach and give advice.

Back to the written tests, he would almost always receive back a completed test, written in the hand of someone who had obviously taught themselves how to read and write. A few months later, he learned to whom the style belonged when a proctor failed to erase the original's name completely prior to adding Sasuke's own from a rubber stamp: Uzumaki Naruto. Out of a rare bout of academic curiosity, he wandered over to Naruto's assigned seat, near the back of the class, and flipped over his returned test during a classroom break.

Naruto's name had been sloppily added, with points deducted for failure to comply with proctor instructions that every test paper be signed. Sasuke smirked at the negative score, flipped the paper back over, and then saw the tiny little doodle of the Uchiha fan in the lower left corner. This was his test, turned in blank. To test his emerging theory, he began discreetly watermarking his blank tests and noted an almost 95% exchange rate between him and Naruto.

Where Sasuke answered nothing, Naruto answered everything, even advanced questions that were never covered in class on tests that Sasuke had never seen before (later he would learn those tests were Chuunin level Occupational Placement Examinations). The real kicker was that where Naruto got deducted for not signing his name as well as not answering questions, Sasuke got extra credit and bonus points for having correctly answered mid-Chuunin grade questions. He was even praised verbally in class with some talk of 'rapid advancement' and 'skipping ranks,' but most often 'as befitting an Uchiha.'

It was amazing. Here was a sloppy, impoverished, skinny and slightly pungent blonde orphan in wildfire orange who was routinely removed from class during important lessons. That was after the boy had numerous accidents during the very first week which left him without any type of textbook. Despite all that, he was blowing the curve on every single written test. This trend continued for most of the first year, but abruptly stopped towards the end of the term.

As far as practical skills went, Sasuke was unchallenged when it came to shuriken or kunai marksmanship with stationary targets. Then he saw Naruto whisper to that Nara kid, who woke up enough to drawl out, "How often will our opponents be stationary?"

The next day, weapon skills were practiced on fast and slow moving targets arranged on pulleys and wires at varying distances. Uzumaki was untouchable, even when the operators tried to make him miss by bouncing and swaying the wire hung targets. Either dead center, every time, or in designated lethal target boxes, with almost perfect conservation of motion and energy and zero chakra usage.

Uzumaki dominated that training session, and even gave others pointers on angles, trajectories, lead-in visual tracking, and the importance of mathematics. It was surreal and unique, in that it happened only once. The next day found the practice range back to stationary targets, Uzumaki was absent, and he wasn't seen again until the beginning of the second year five weeks later.

If anything, he was even louder and more idiotic upon his return, but something had changed. Sasuke never received one of Naruto's relabeled tests again. When he had checked the Idiot's paper, he found that Naruto, instead of answering the questions, had opted to create paneled cartoons of him stealing the Hokage hat along with Hokage-sama's pipe, converting it to blow bubbles instead of tobacco smoke, and then signing in victory while Hokage-sama wept anime-rivers in the background.

He didn't even attempt to answer anything, only deigning to scrawl his name as crudely and large as possible in the designated spot, complete with chibi-fied personifications of him eating ramen, waving vulgar expressions towards the reader. He cut class, he slept during lessons, threw every sparring match, and could be seen aiming every where but the targets during weapon drills.

Through discreet observation, Naruto seemed to avoid even more strenuously Haruno Sakura. Whenever possible though, she would corner him and loudly proclaim that she would never go on a date with him, replete with physical blows. Towards the middle of the second year, someone had the bright idea to partner Uzumaki and Haruno when they split into two-person study groups. Though he had heard the term 'rictus of terror,' he had never personally seen it until group announcements were made.

Regardless, Sasuke knew Naruto was faking his skills and intelligence. He knew that much from the prior year, and you just don't lose skills like that over night. Something had happened to the kid, and for Sasuke's dream of restoring honor to his fallen clan and avenging his parent's murder, he would need Naruto to survive. Sasuke knew that with a rival of Naruto's caliber, it would be a breeze to evolve his Sharingan so he could kill Itachi.

* * *

Of the many things Uzumaki Naruto was, an idiot was not one of them. He was actually very intelligent, and would have enjoyed a certain level of sly craftiness even without the vulpine mental addition. He just played the part of the village idiot out of survival-borne necessity, especially following the one time they had moving targets during weapon drills.

Uchiha Sasuke's Fan Club had somehow found him and had beaten him senseless for 'insulting Sasuke-kun' or something similar. It was all news to him; he had only spoken to the brooding Uchiha once. After the insulting response _and _the subsequent beating for 'disrespecting Sasuke-kun,' he never tried again. Shame it didn't stop the classroom and break-time beat downs. But this beating was different.

He felt all but one chakra signature leave, the one remaining rather small and almost easy to miss. The owner of that signature dragged his unconscious body somewhere, he still doesn't know where, and slapped him awake. When he awoke he saw Haruno Sakura sitting in a wooden chair off to the side of where he was rather securely bound.

She had with her writing supplies, a journal, a stopwatch, and a stout piece of blood-splattered lumber. She simply said one thing, "You did something to make my mother cry and you will tell me what that something was."

Then, she started to beat him and cut him and time how long it took for wounds to heal and bones to mend, all while taking careful notes in a clinically detached manner regarding stages of healing and any oddities. Such as the hissing sound and apparent steam which came from his skin flaps pulling together and closing without even the slightest scar or blemish. Or the interesting color display as deep bruises from ruptured bone capillaries would quickly shift from that deepest black and green all the way up to his normal tanned tone.

This continued for three days, and whenever he awoke from the latest torture session, Sakura would appear as if summoned with her coldly calculating eyes, pick up the bloodied bludgeon, and pick up where she left off.

In his delusional state, he wondered when she was going to start cutting off things, and was muzzily curious if anything cut off could be reattached or regrown. It was during this time that she adopted her habit of wearing blood red dresses over black shorts; certain fluids would blend in easier and it was easier to clean. Towards the end of the third day, though dehydrated and starved, he was finally conscious and clear minded enough, the skull fractures and brain swelling having already healed, that he was able to focus and use the Body Switch with her empty chair to finally escape that room.

He hid in the surrounding woods, rationalizing the scenery change as 'practical woodland survival skills' and lived off the land until the end of the term. He was banking on the fact that Sakura had demonstrated sub-standard practical skills and would not find him; in this he was correct. He was also hoping against hope that Sakura or himself would be placed in another class once the Academy resumed. It was not to meant to be.

On _certain_ thought levels, he didn't blame her at all, though her detached manner through it all seriously unnerved him. Most of him came to hate and fear the little banshee, but there was that small part of him which defended her actions. He knew what he was, having figured it out from epithets spat upon him during beatings, or shouted at him as he walked or ran through the streets and alleys.

He knew he was the jailer of the dreaded Lord of all Demons, the Kyuubi no Kitsune, the Nine Tailed Demon Fox, the Living Embodiment of Fire. Several years later when the traitor Mizuki 'revealed' this village secret, Naruto wasn't shocked from the knowledge (he had known for years) but from actually hearing it out of someone else's mouth. It was one thing to think of oneself as part demon, but quite another to actually be called _the _Kyuubi reborn; it wasn't something he would ever get used to hearing.

But, he knew he was the Kyuubi's jailer, vessel, container, whatever. He knew this, but he also knew that since the fox was inside him, part of him was the fox, or at least influenced by it, which did make him the fox. Kinda. Which made him at least partially responsible for the sins of the fox. It was complicated, but the best he could come up with at the moment. He was only seven, after all.

So, being partially responsible for the fox's crimes, Naruto tried very hard not to hold any of the villagers' actions or words against them. He hated the fox too, it having robbed him of parents, friends, acceptance and love. The closest thing he ever had to 'physical affection' was a drunken hug from a villager which changed into a spirited attempt to compress and snap Naruto's spine once the villager realized who/what he held.

Besides, he reasoned that if he and the fox shared the same body, that meant the fox would feel anything done to Naruto. That didn't mean Naruto was suicidal or a cutter or anything. He figured he got enough of that crap from the outside without feeling the need to add more personally.

Despite everything thrown at him though, Naruto was a fairly content survivor. One would think he would be cynical, sour and completely jaded, but that couldn't be further from reality. He actually tried to see the best in people and figured things could always be worse. He was an optimist through and through, and a bona-fide people person, though not quite the hyperkinetic ball of living sunshine he used as his outer personae.

Still, try as he might, he really couldn't blame people for, well, being people, especially hurt and grieving people needing an outlet for their raw emotions. He didn't necessarily like or enjoy his treatment at their hands, but knew cathartic release when he saw it. It was needed for them to heal. He had the fox for his wounds, at least the non-emotional ones. For everything else, the fox (and Naruto by proxy) most likely deserved it.

* * *

What he didn't know was that Sakura, thanks to sharing her stories, reports and notes with her mother, who in turn shared them with select councilors, had begun rudimentary medical training after the first year. Due to Naruto's advanced healing and regenerative capabilities, he was the perfect test subject for the budding medic. Though their relationship would never really improve, her treatment of him did moderately as they never had a repeat of anything as brutal as that first clinical basement experience. Anything over that could be called an improvement.

By the time Team Selections came around, her view on Naruto had risen, slightly. Fishcake, as she called him, was used as more of a title than a name. She felt he had yet to earn the privilege of even _being _named. As far as she was concerned, Fishcake started life as an object.

He was a scavenger, then a punching bag, then a medical dummy. He was a thing. Over time, he graduated to animal since things are incapable of thought and learning. It is rather difficult to get a conditioned response from a potted plant or a chunk of coal.

An animal, however, could be trained, and she had one which was self-healing. Despite her ministrations, methods or experiments, she never did get a satisfactory answer for how Naruto was connected with her mother's grief. However, her observations of Naruto and clinical notes, before and after Team Seven's formation, would form the groundwork for the Council Elders' ultimate plan for the Fourth's Legacy.


	2. No good deed goes unpunished

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

A memory came to him. That was really all he had now. Memories. He had been sealed and imprisoned for indeterminate time for something he was rather certain he deserved. Yet despite his most heinous crimes, far too many to obviously list individually, he was still allowed to serve his beloved village. That thought made his thin face glow momentarily, that even one such as he could have a purpose.

The memory was of a shrill pink haired banshee, a dark and moody spoiled princeling, and a one-eyed perverted scarecrow. It was almost like the main cast of a dark parody involving yellow brick roads and winged saru-oji-sans. Heh, flying monkey uncles, the Old Man would've gotten a chuckle out of that were he still alive. He didn't hear much of anything about current events, or even remotely current, but he did know the Old Man was dead. He remembers placing the flower by his picture in the rain, surrounded by other nins, but kept distinctly separated. And then had been the nightmarish ride prior to his conviction and imprisonment.

* * *

He and Jiraiya had been sent by the Council Elders to find and return Tsunade, the Slug Princess, to take up the position as the Fifth Hokage. After about a month of traveling from one gambling town to another, seemingly filled to the brim with brothels and escort agencies, they chanced upon the buxom blonde and her dark haired assistant the one time Jiraiya opted to eat first and whore later. That encounter led to a pitched Sannin battle a week later between the three former teammates.

Though extremely outclassed, he fought alongside Jiraiya, Tsunade and Shizune, protecting them, lending tactical support and finally directly assaulting the traitor Kabuto when he went to kill Tsunade in her hemophobic stupor. Kabuto and Orochimaru made their escape but not before the Snake Master snagged him in that super long freak tongue, hit him with a paralyzing snake bite, and dragged him underground.

Jiraiya and company couldn't give chase due to Shizune's and Tsunade's injuries, not to mention Jiraiya still suffering from the drugged drink his former teammate slipped him the night prior. From what Naruto understood much later, the group recuperated long enough to get on the road to Konoha and from there would mount a search and rescue operation for him. That was superseded, however, by the broody princeling being willingly kidnapped, and since the Uchiha blood had a higher priority than a Demon-brat's life, resources were allocated first to the Uchiha's recovery mission.

Meanwhile, Naruto found himself quickly trundled back to Sound for testing. Orochimaru, having run into the Kyuubi vessel too many times and witnessed that destructive power, wanted to harvest some of it, if not for himself, then for his troops. Let Cloud dream of Hyuuga eyes; Sound would be Kyuubi-fied! And then they went and underestimated him. Again. Naruto was only a Genin, after all, and by all _official _accounts, a rather poor one at that. Even that was a bit too charitable.

Naruto's official team role, not that Naruto knew, was to safeguard the rest of the team, especially the Uchiha, serve as a distraction during tactical retreats, sacrifice himself for the well-being of the team, and to be a live-fire practice dummy for Sasuke and Sakura. His phenomenal healing and regenerative factor would make anyone drool. Practically immortal and stupendously under skilled.

The was the official line on one Uzumaki Naruto.

They had obviously missed the multiple file boxes filled to overflow with Naruto's prankster exploits prior to his Academy graduation, filed under Special Circumstances. Some people had single, thin folders. Others might have a thick folder, drawer or maybe even a shelf.

Naruto had boxes stuffed with thick folders detailing weekly reports, every week for eight years just on his pranks, traps, and basic hooliganisms. On a darker side, he had even more boxes in a special facility which housed his personal medical records which only two people knew about: Sarutobi's former teammates, and they weren't talking.

So, going off the mission reports and weekly team briefings involving Naruto's contribution, a rather bleak picture was painted. So Kabuto, in his condescending way, belittled and humiliated Naruto while strapping him to a worktable. The moment Kabuto took his eyes off Naruto, a sequence of events played out which no one would have expected.

They failed to seal off Naruto's considerable chakra. So one Body Switch and Kabuto found himself face down on the worktable, strapped over-securely in place. The straps were for Naruto's size, not his, and were very strong. Strong enough to hold a raging Naruto-size Kyuubi. The next thing was a pop of air displacement and the almost silent sizzling of friction heated air. Naruto didn't even bother calling out the technique's name. He just drilled a very tightly and well-formed Rasengan into the back of Kabuto's skull while his clone combined a smaller version combined with Konoha's secret Taijutsu: Thousand Years of Pain ass poke.

The results were rather impressive.

Angry, shocked and sickened, Naruto backpedaled, bumping into a shelf filled with bottles, and like dominoes - tic tic tic - shelf after shelf of bottles and canisters holding fluids and body parts shattered around the room, some rather virulent acids finding Kabuto's tethered remains on the shattered table. In the toxic confusion, Naruto made his escape with the help of clones, his special Transformation and another well-timed Switch with a Sound squad just before they left out on patrol.

It would take almost ten hours before Orochimaru learned of Kabuto's fate, when said assistant failed to arrive for Orochimaru's twice-daily bandage replacements. And by then, another kink would enter the Snake Master's plans.

* * *

He wasn't sure who was the more surprised, himself or his brooding teammate. Here he was, leaving Sound for Konoha, and there was Sasuke, leaving Konoha for Sound. Thinking that maybe his teammate got lost, and knowing somewhat his own team-role, he volunteered to escort Sasuke back to Konoha.

Some time later, he decided that Sasuke might not be all there, that the spiral hickey which gave Sasuke gray skin, big white hair, yellow eyes and two large hand-wings? might also be interfering with his mind and normal good sense. After all, Sasuke was a genius which meant he had above average thinking skills, better than Naruto at any rate. So Naruto surmised that Sasuke was possessed, in a way, and needed help or an exorcism. Or maybe a Team Gai intervention. But no green spandex was in sight though there were echoes of 'Youth!' in the air.

This led to Naruto getting most of his right lung temporarily removed as a gray clawed hand punched through his chest, chirping madly; several other bones broken; and one amazingly beat-down, not to mention very surprised looking, Uchiha Sasuke. Crossing the border over the impressive Valley of the End, things went weird quickly.

Hatake was there for starters and before Naruto was knocked unconscious, he heard his sensei say something about missing-nin and attacking a Konoha shinobi. The subsequent trial was amazingly efficient and speedy. The Hokage and her assistant Shizune were absent, having gone to a treaty finalization with Sand on the Fire/Wind border.

In her place, seated between Horuma and Koharu, Sarutobi's former teammates and Council Elders, was none other than Haruno Sakura, Naruto's third teammate. Being the new apprentice to the Slug Princess, rules regarding the Hokage's representative allowed her to sit in their place should the Hokage or her personal assistant be absent when it came to shinobi related criminal proceedings.

Since it was a shinobi related criminal proceeding, no civilian council members were present. Allegedly, due to the sensitivity of the proceedings, even military department heads and clan leaders were absent. Only the two Elder Councilors and the Hokage's representative were in attendance.

So after the rapid presentation of charges (desertion, dereliction of duty, insubordination, deadly assault on a Konoha shinobi, lethal interference with a search and rescue mission and gross negligence) which a severely drugged Naruto watched in a detached, and some thought arrogant, manner (the dosages were potent enough to even incapacitate the Kyuubi, which was the original intent), the punishment was quickly handed down and executed.

Decommissioned. Life Imprisonment. Sealed. Solitary Confinement. Physically Restrained.

Some strictures would be lessened, a bit, if Naruto cooperated peaceably, to which Naruto gave his trademarked Idiot Grin and nodded. He wasn't really capable of anything else. He knew he got off light though, since even he knew enough to know even half of those charges were tantamount to treason, and that punishment was public execution by jutsu. He didn't know just how his sealed away medical records also sealed his fate.

He was quickly removed from society.

* * *

When he next became 'aware,' it was dark. He could feel that he was hooded, his arms and legs were spread and strapped to a rather comfortable surface, he was upright, and his hands were spread open, palm up with each finger held securely in place. Further pseudo-inspection revealed something taped to his left arm with tubes. And then there was his chakra.

He could feel it, but couldn't access it. Since he was restrained and obviously couldn't move about like he normally did, which was akin to a caffiene-corn syrup-death by chocolate energy high in a three year old, his chakra had no way to be used, so it stayed inside, swirling around and containing the Fox even better, as well as leaking out of his pores creating what would have been a vibrant blue haze had he not been hooded. He could feel it though.

Deprived of sight, at least for the moment, he focused on his other senses and quickly became aware of three things. First, aside from his current situation, there was no hint of the Fox. Sure, he could sense the spiritual form behind the cage, but couldn't sense anything coming _from _that form. It was as if they great Kyuubi no Kitsune was asleep or comatose. Secondly, he could still feel the Kitsune's chakra being processed and purified by his seal; even in this state, he was still absorbing the Kyuubi's power. Absorbing it, aware of it, but unable to touch it.

It was almost like an aquarium: a clear wall separated him from what was contained. He could still see the fish and water, but couldn't touch it through the glass. So it was with his chakra. And finally, it was quiet. Very quiet. The only sounds, even if he concentrated on hearing, was his own body, the very slight rustlings and creaks from whatever he was on, and the very faint buzzing above him.

Anyhow, he figured this was better than he deserved. Despite the assurances of Old Man Hokage and Iruka-sensei, Naruto always felt some modicum of guilt and self-loathing after he learned what he was during Mizuki's betrayal. Throughout his young life he had been constantly reminded of what the Fox did, so once he learned the Fox was sealed in him, that made the Fox part of him and thereby he was partly responsible for the Fox's actions. At least marginally responsible. It was complicated.

He couldn't quite remember the court proceedings or even what happened when he met his former sensei while carrying a battered and hogtied teammate. But he figured he would not be in this situation without a very good reason, and since he was in this situation it must've been for a very good reason and thereby, deserved.

He tried to keep track of days at first, but that proved to be rather difficult. He quickly figured out that trying to count intervals when the surface he was on would slide down to a horizontal position using chains and rails, or the times when someone would visit with a bucket of water and a forceful Water technique, were an exercise in futility as they had no discernible rhythm. Sometimes he would have several 'baths' a 'day,' while other times it would seem longer, somehow, between baths.

He kind of figured the whole horizontal/vertical thing was to prevent blood pooling and clot formation. Being imprisoned for life and suffering a lethal stroke from leg blood clots stemming from blood pooling would be an irony which would quite fail to amuse the Council. So he had his very own, well, he surmised it was water powered somehow, spa table. Which would explain part of its comfort. All in all he reasoned that for the crimes he obviously committed, he had it rather good. He knew it could always be worse.

He wasn't sure how long it had been. Sometime early during his confinement, he had been completely stripped, which he understood was standard procedure. Shinobi are rather proficient in hiding almost anything in the thinnest of materials. Sometime after that realization, he was granted something like a half-apron. It went around the waist and hung down his front to his knees. He figured out the length from a bath once when he felt the wet material slap against his kneecaps.

So a modesty panel, which meant a mixed gender guard pool. It had been some time since those discoveries, and during one of his later baths he felt his own hair plastered to his collarbones from under his hood. So he hazarded the guess that he had been imprisoned for roughly six to eight months, maybe a year since his hair had been rather short and spiky prior to his trial.

It was around the time that his hair was down to his waist that he had official visitors. He wasn't even aware of them until someone slapped him awake (he had gotten to the point of being able to sleep through his baths, no matter how strong the jutsu.)

"Inmate C-258-B3, the Honorable Councilors Horuma and Koharu are here to evaluate your conditions."

At his nod, someone cleared their throat and spoke in what he guessed was a 'grandmotherly' tone, sweet and wheedling geriatric.

"Uzumaki-san, if you agree to our offerings you will be rewarded with a few freedoms and liberties. We have been duly notified of your exemplary behavior during your incarceration."

He shot his head up at the beginning. The last time anyone had said his name, his actual name instead of his prisoner file, or some derogatory Academy epithet, was right before he killed Kabuto. Not that anyone knew, cared or would even believe it. So it did come as a shock to hear his name politely, if cordially, spoken.

"Despite your sins against society, for which you are being punished, there are some on the Council who feel you could still be of service to Konoha, and after some deliberation, we agree. What we are offering should correctly be seen as an honor, especially to one in your position. But we will not force this upon you. The choice is yours: will you serve Konoha and be rewarded, or will you remain sealed from the world with only your limited senses and memories for company?"

Naruto tilted his head and thought briefly, then nodded. His hood covered and restrained his jaw, and it had been quite some time since he ever attempted any semblance of speech.

"We are pleased you agree. You will be providing your genetic material for the betterment of Konoha's shinobi. Your records indicate a naturally occurring large and dense chakra pool along with an incredibly high stamina. Your 'tenant' has contributed to your charka stores as well as accelerated healing and regenerative properties. Given that this has been going on almost the entirely of your life, we feel confident that these qualities have been imprinted on your DNA and are inheritable.

"This could prove highly beneficial to our village, as any offspring would more than likely exhibit these same traits. It is a true shame all that happened, as these traits could have been a proven bloodline and your place cemented in society as a new clan head. Thankfully, my fellow Honorable Councilor and I were able to convince the rest of the Shinobi Panel to spare you from execution in light of what you could still provide to the village. Given the magnitude of your offenses, that was not an easy task."

Naruto was stunned. He might have an actual bloodline. Him! He could have started a clan, his very own family! He would be accorded a council seat as a clan head and be that much closer to his aborted dream of Hokage. What he possessed was needed, wanted and _desired _by the village that shunned him. And he just had to muck all that up, throw away his options, choices and life.

He still wasn't quite sure what it was he did, but figured to have all those enviable genetic qualities and _still _needing the Elder Councilors to change his punishment from death to imprisonment, whatever he had done must've have been incredibly stupid and deadly serious. He was very thankful the Old Man wasn't alive to be shamed by the complete and utter mess Naruto has made of his life, even after all the doors the Old Man had opened for him.

He had a suspicion that Kyuubi had something to do with it; Fuzzy must've taken control temporarily, raised hell, then left leaving Naruto holding the bag. Typical, just like on the bridge during that Wave mission.

Koharu's voice broke him from his musings. "In return for your donations, your hood will be removed and you will be allowed physical meals, personal grooming and limited mobility. With continued cooperation, other liberties may be included, such as educational materials, entertainment literature and exercise equipment. If you really impress us, we may even be able to lesson your punishments sufficiently to allow you scrolls, writing materials, and limited access to your chakra.

"Keep in mind that all of this is up to you. I understand this is a lot to take in and is rather sudden. We both empathize with you. However, our hands are tied and we are limited in what we can offer. This is truly the best deal we can give you."

They watched Naruto careful, twisted smirks blossoming on their wrinkled faces as he nodded once more. True, they could have taken his sperm by force, but there would be no guarantee that someone might slip in and...destroy that opportunity with an efficient castration. Having a willing donor now, that was another issue.

The freedoms weren't much, though more than he currently had, and could possibly prevent anyone desiring to...nip this project in the bud, so to speak. He would be a moving target, after all, and the limited chakra allowance could even make escape on the walls or ceiling possible from any possible assailant.

They knew very well his trickster ways and were careful to not underestimate him. If anything, they might very well have gained a most valuable tool. A valuable, willing tool. What that busty drunken blonde didn't know, couldn't hurt them. Indeed, it was a good day to be an Elder Councilor.

As they left the very secure holding cell below the Hokage Tower, they knew that soon they would have a military force to be reckoned with. They had spent the past year going through civilian personnel records and vetting prospective birth candidates. Non-shinobi, non-clan only. They wanted a force loyal to the village, council and Hokage, in that order, with no ties to a clan or shinobi family to complicate priorities.

Granted, it would take a good ten to thirteen years for initial fruition, but even if they passed on prior to realization, the groundwork would have been already laid out for project completion. Also, once there were children with Naruto's blood in them, that would make bypassing Namikaze's blood seals that much easier. That bastard made devious seals requiring not just the correct blood, but also body heat, physical motion and cellular activity. Since they didn't really want to use Naruto himself, they would use a proxy to gain the last of the Fourth Hokage's estate, vault and holdings.

They had waited this long just for Naruto to physically age enough, and it was highly fortuitous that he was not only kidnapped by Orochimaru and escaped, but also that he captured the defecting Uchiha by _force_. Naruto handed them more than enough circumstances to twist just enough to make all this possible. Had Naruto arrived at the Sound/Fire border any later, he could've totally missed Sasuke and all trumped up charges hinged on that chance meeting.

It was a very good day to be an Elder Councilor, and kept getting better.


	3. As the noodles churn

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

During Naruto's first year of secret incarceration, several events took place in the outside world. Tsunade had taken up the position as the Fifth Hokage shortly after Naruto's kidnapping. She had hoped to use the position to dispatch an ANBU detachment to save him from Orochimaru's experiments. Then one Uchiha Sasuke went missing, rumored to have been kidnapped though later it was shown he had willingly defected albeit under the supposed influence of the Curse Seal.

Shortly after the teams were sent out to find the Uchiha, she had been sent by the Council with a delegation to finalize the surrender of Wind to Fire on the border, as well as to create new trade agreements and military programs. After she returned from that successful summit, she learned that Naruto had killed Kabuto and had apparently died soon after from massive injuries from Chakra Blades. Enraged by her continued losses of precious people and to avenge Naruto, she ordered an assault be launched on Orochimaru, spearheaded by herself and Jiraiya.

Konoha's forces had been decimated from the Kyuubi attack and had been slowly rebuilding their forces when Orochimaru struck during the Chuunin Exams. They had lost a significant portion of their forces during the failed Sound/Sand invasion. It took many years to train up a shinobi, and only seconds to undo all that training. On the other side, Orochimaru would brook no rivalry, and took drastic measures to ensure none of his shinobi could challenge his position as Kage. So he opted for quantity over quality, and tools over techniques.

Orochimaru was severely weakened by Kabuto's death, as being naturally paranoid had allowed no one else to learn the inner workings of his Immortality Jutsu or the heavily supporting medical arts needed for a successful vessel transference. Against the higher skilled forces of Konoha and his two rampaging teammates, he never stood a chance, even in his 'true' form. Not a single white snake survived. Sound village was decimated, dismantled and salted, Sound was reverted back to the Land of Rice and made a Fire territory, which the new Rice daimyo was more than happy to accept.

They had killed the Kage, Council and scant Jounin ranks, leaving Chuunin, Genin, support personnel and civilians, a large percentage of which were brought back to Konoha to bolster the village's military power and infrastructure. The transplants were given quarters in the abandoned Uchiha sector. After The Uchiha Massacre, no one had lived there, not even the sole survivor Sasuke. Instead, Sasuke had several sumptuous apartments in Konoha, staffed and maintained by the families of former Uchiha retainers who had been absent during the massacre but who still wished to serve the Uchiha clan, even if it was currently a clan of one.

No hidden village would be rebuilt in the Land of Rice, though several forts were constructed by Konoha and Fire, manned by Konoha Genin and Chuunin forces under Jounin leadership as part of their 'hardships' to teach team skills, leadership roles, and further study in supporting shinobi arts in preparation for Chuunin and Jounin exams.

* * *

A few months later, the remnants of Gato's forces in Wave allied with Water and the Mizukage, thinking that Konoha would be too distracted by the Sound War, sent the bulk of his navy along with several hundred trained shinobi to take Wave by force. Wave was quickly becoming an economic powerhouse thanks to the recently constructed bridge and the plundering of Gato's shipping company by Wave residents after his defeat.

Konoha responded by sending several thousand trained shinobi (almost half were captured Sound nin), a portion of which were part of the recently reconstructed Fire fleet led by Umino Iruka. Iruka knew how much Wave meant to Naruto, as that was the first time the young boy had ever felt accepted for who he was, not what. And he'd be damned if he was going to let **anyone **mess with that memory. Water's vanguard was shattered by the multi-pronged attack, their much larger navy decimated by Iruka's rage and fearsome whale summons.

Wave was liberated again, and plans drawn up for a new hidden village, sponsored and supported by Konoha to help defend that nation against further incursions. It was here that Umino offered his services as a teacher and instructor. In Wave he found many positive memories of Naruto, from The Great Naruto Bridge to joyous stories about his favorite knucklehead, all of which seemed to offend most of the members of the rebuilt Team Seven.

This was especially true when Ino, Sakura's rival for Sasuke's affection, asked rather pointed questions along the lines of "Why is the bridge named after Naruto? You told me it was Sasuke's!" The only one who seemed not to be upset was the latest addition of Sai, but then not much seemed to affect him.

The story that upset Team Seven even more than the bridge was the one about The Golden Horde, when Naruto, using the chakra control gained from the tree climbing exercise, frivolously and stupendously created literally thousands of Shadow Clones. A large contingent swarmed the bridge filling roles of assistants and gophers for the crew and workers.

Hundreds more poured into the ocean returning with a veritable bounty, which then set off a seafood cleaning/roasting frenzy to feed the workers, families and friends. All that coupled with wild game and Gato's looted food stores created enough food to feed Wave for a solid month. During and after all of that activity, the children and other villagers were entertained by another group of Narutos using his advanced Henge to enact stories, complete with clones made into props, as they were being told to him by the villagers.

All the while, the original Naruto acted as part orchestra conductor, traffic coordinator and mother hen, overseeing the massive sea of orange and yellow with flair and precision. Sakura was dumbstruck, Sasuke was literally gnashing his teeth in fury at the display of power which should have rightfully belonged to him and Kakashi vowed to never again teach Naruto anything which would upstage his unofficial apprentice.

Besides, Konoha, for Iruka, held many painful memories, and since Wave was basically a protectorate of Konoha, it wasn't like he was technically leaving the village. He was merely on a teaching mission for an indeterminate length of time. Besides, this place would benefit more from the generations of naval tactics and skills the Umino Clan possessed, and the Dolphin of Fire was born to teach.

He had already met _the _Inari and Tsunami, having heard of them from Naruto. He wasn't really sure what to believe until he got here, and the tale Naruto spun didn't do his exploits justice. Tsunami told him even more stories, more in-depth, of the adopted son she found in Naruto. Inari was speechless, for here, in the flesh, was Naruto's famous teacher, Umino Iruka who was willing to stay and teach him. The only way it could possibly be better would be if Naruto was here himself.

Team Eight felt vindicated, at least Hyuuga Hinata did. Since coming to terms with the news of Naruto's death, she vowed to become a kunoichi he would have been proud to call wife and had made strong strides in her personal fighting style. Knowing that her crush and inspiration was a hero to the people here only strengthened her resolve.

Her eyes slid over to the sulking live-fire training dummy known as Sakura. Since they were both receiving medical training from Tsunade, anything she did to Sakura during spars following every derogatory statement about Naruto could be easily fixed. As far as Hinata was concerned, Sakura was virtually immortal, short of a liquidating juuken strike to the skull, and made the perfect training dummy, just like a rowdy energetic blonde boy had been Sakura's.

Sakura had no illusions to what would happen to her if the truth ever got out about Naruto and knew the Hyuuga Heiress would never be punished, just as she knew Sasuke would never be punished when Naruto could be, and was, the scapegoat for Sasuke's treason. The only reason he stayed in Konoha after his failed desertion was the death of Orochimaru, who had promised him power yet was powerless in the face of Konoha's alleged weakness.

Team Eight, Tsunade, Shizune and Iruka were the only ones of the Konoha forces to join with Tsunami's family for Naruto's impromptu wake, where stories were passed long into the night with Shino offering rare insights, Kiba recalling pranks and class ditchings and Tazuna regaling them with over-the-top stories of Naruto during Team Seven's month long mission in Wave.

Of the captured Water forces, the Jounin were ransomed off while the Chuunin and lower, which was the bulk of the invading forces, were allowed the option of forced labor until ransomed, or restarting their shinobi careers under the banner of Konoha. Consequently, Konoha's military might grew by an eighth, and their coffers by another third.

The Hokage and her advisors stayed to hammer out Water's terms of surrender and the Council Elders took that opportunity to add prospective Wave carriers to the Sound and Konoha list. If things went smoothly, after a few more months, they would approach the demon child with a 'deal'. Then they could easily use artificial insemination, a technique developed by Tsunade herself during the Third Shinobi War, to handpick future mothers without ever having to sully one by exposure to the Kyuubi vessel or playing into its sick fetishes.

They already had plans to test a new contraption which a native inventor had created using the principles of negative vacuum pressure, powered by a rechargeable chakra battery. It was originally slated for animal husbandry, especially the dairy industry, but was an untested technology. So during a brainstorming session, the answer appeared in full poetic glory. Since animal testing for use on animals was cruel, and human testing for animals could be lethal, why not pick both? They already had a nearly immortal part demon, part human, part animal creature with a very high pain tolerance and regenerative abilities on hand.

If the technology doesn't work, no great loss and he'll most likely regenerate any damage. But if it does work, not only could it mean a boon to the dairy industry, but they could also easily harvest bloodlines from shinobis and civilians. And if it worked like they thought it would work, they might even be able to get paying volunteers. All they needed was a little bit more time to solidify plans, then they would go forward with initial beta testing. Knowing from reports that Naruto was almost completely socially isolated, even getting confused by platonic hugs, he might even thank them for being allowed the honor of being the test subject after his first trial run.

* * *

Though they were never able to conclusively identify Naruto's alleged remains from the former Sound village, his memory was still served in other ways. Although completely stonewalled by the Shinobi and Civilian Council on having Naruto's name added to the Memorial Stone, Tsunade still decided to serve as Hokage in his memory, and to take a more active role in grooming Konohamaru to become the Sixth. She was the medic's Medic, after all, and would purge her liver of sake-induced toxins daily, and was working on an automatic purification seal alongside Jiraiya so they could drink to Naruto's memory, be completely bat-faced stupid drunk, and then in moments be able to be completely rational, sensible, and on the ball.

Konohamaru, in turn, had become more serious after the death of his brother, rival and Boss and threw himself into his training and studies. Jiraiya, though he never gave up the task of writing given to him by the Toad Sage, made it a point of principle and honor to include Naruto or Naruko (Naruto's henged female form) in prominent Icha-Icha roles. The good meaty ones. He thought Naruto would vehemently and quite vocally disapprove, irrespective of gender role, which conversely was the super pervert's vote of confidence.

Jiraiya knew Naruto was alive somewhere but didn't want to give any false hope to Tsunade, knowing she would quickly inform the rest of Naruto's unofficial family. He knew Naruto wasn't dead since his signature on the Toad Summon scroll was still red. If a summoner died, the signature turned black, and there were still two red signatures: his and Naruto's. What he didn't know was the boy's location or even physical state, since there were many ways one could be alive, if even technically.

Where ever he was being held, his captors must've taken the Toad Summons into account since none of them could find him. Normally, and especially with a common summoner, a summons could be sent from one to the other almost instantly, appearing next to the target. To send a summons to a non-summoner or the holder of another contract, it took a bit longer, sometimes weeks if the target moved around often. Naruto was a Toad Summoner, was already a favorite of the ruling Toad family, had a red signature on the contract and they couldn't find him. He was alive and in an extremely secure location.

* * *

On another espionage side, Naruto's alleged death threw Akatsuki for a loop, since they had really counted on the Lord of all Demons, the dreaded Kyuubi no Kitsune, the Nine Tailed Fire Fox, to be their primary addition to their Bijuu construct. Even if they captured the Bijuu before hand, they still had to extract them in order, from single tail through nine.

They could theorize all they wanted, but the facts remained that the intricate seals created on the living molten statue as it plinked and cooled demanded a natural order of things: least to greatest. There was not a seal in existence, nor one which could be created, which allowed for any other numerical hierarchy. Greatest to least, or least to greatest. There was no hodgepodge middle ground when creating the ultimate demonic golem.

In short, Akatsuki was extremely frustrated. Not only could they not get the Nine-Tails, but they would have to recreate the binding statue to allow for Eight Tails and that just wouldn't do. Madara's pride demanded no less, him being the hidden leader/advisor behind Pein's throne and the one behind the spiraled orange mask. Him, who had summoned the Kyuubi in the first place when he challenged the First Hokage, was denied ultimate subjugation of the most chaotic and destructive of any of the natural chakra spirits. If he wasn't already mad, he would've been.

They would have to recreate the massive statue in a molten state prior to the application of thousands of internal seals, and their last earth user perished performing the sealing techniques. Death was almost a requirement. But the only earth wielder who came even remotely close in skill was a hermaphrodite with an explosion fetish. Not settings things on fire, rampant destruction or even the smoking aftermath, but the explosions themselves. Boom-chick a-boom boom, baby!

Madara was really counting on that Bijuu statue. He really was. All he had left, after the debacle of a civil war with the legendary Hanzo, of all people, were a handful of S and SS classed missing nins and a shattered populous. Sure the shinobi were demi-quasi gods in their own right, having survived the baptism of Hanzo's summoned salamander fire, but none of them could forge even a halfway decent kunai. Or grow anything aside from disturbingly familiar mushroom clouds.

It was one thing to be kick-ass ninjas. It was quite another to be kick-ass ninjas with embarrassing inferior weapons and tools, the kind that snap, break or simply crumble at the most inopportune time. It was shameful, humiliating and ultimately unfulfilling. What was the point of killing a potent enemy when they didn't respect you in the least?

Madara, through Pein, controlled the small, land-locked, and perpetually soggy country, appropriately named Land of Rain. Outside of the psychotic neo-tech cityscape, which was kind of creepy cool in its own right, there was near on impassable rain forests filled with suspiciously cannibalistic tribes that would even give him a run for the money if they were in a blood lust fever. Rumor was that Zetsu was a veritable demigod outside the cities. Not hemi-demi-quasi, but a full on demi, due largely in part to his carnivorous plant affinity and appearance, but also to his apparent cannibalistic appetite.

Zetsu was rarely teamed and usually tasked with mop-up after his espionage activities. He drove the natives into religiously zealoted aphrodisiacal nirvanas which would even make Hidan break out in a cold sweat and reevaluate his spiritual choices.

As much as his methodical mind hated it, he might just have to scrap the entire program and start over, with new members, even though Kakuzu was extremely proficient in money raising to the point of convincing yard sale mavens to invest in questionable time-share properties. That man...thing was truly an artist.

Ultimately, it would take a lot of time to rebuild the Akatsuki seeing as it was absolutely critical that he had an Uchiha. Sasuke was damaged goods, in multiple ways, and would absolutely need to get laid to even remotely have the chance at offspring. Either that or he got imprisoned for extremely heinous crimes against society, which his name and status would protect from outright execution, and his sperm was forcibly extracted and inseminated to make more Uchihas. Which was looking more likely as the young teen was becoming positively hostile towards females in general and particular.

Since the death of Naruto no Kyuubi had become even more withdrawn and moody, which gave in turn a new depth and level to emo-nosity. If things progressed as they were, he might even have to ban Itachi from using that 'weak and lack hatred' line, which he seemed to adore to preternatural fervor, even admonishing his oatmeal once. It was an absolute shame and waste what happened during a supposedly innocent spar between Itachi and his partner, Kisame. Somehow, Itachi literally became half the man he used to be and irrevocably sterile. What he wouldn't give for a clan of 'normal' psychopathic egotists. He needed Uchihas, dammit!

* * *

Gaara, the feared Sand Jinchuuriki, or Living Sacrifice, missed his unofficial brother, even though their contact had been rather brief. However, in those few minutes outside of Konoha during the failed Sound/Sand invasion, Gaara and Naruto had understood each other on levels few ever reach during their lifetimes. They knew, at the bone, what it meant to live each others life. Their core difference was that Gaara had family; Naruto was a complete orphan.

Following the news of Naruto's death from injuries stemming from the killing of Kabuto, Gaara vowed to be the kind of person Naruto would have wanted as a brother if Naruto had actual family. For the first month of this, Temari's traditional four ponytails were impossible to set as her hair would quite fail to loosen from the trademarked Poofball of Fright. As for Kankuro, his face was so slick from nervous sweat that his kabuki makeup refused to stick. The stuff wouldn't even apply, regardless of thickness or composition. For the first time in many years, Kankuro felt very naked and vulnerable.

Gaara had discovered things about himself, such as his prankster nature and became, to everyone's apparent confusion, an avid pen pal of Konohamaru in Konoha. Even though Konohamaru was focused on fulfilling not only his own but also Naruto's dream of being the best Hokage ever, he still made time to answer every message, regaling Gaara with tales of Naruto's more well known pranks, as well as sending declassified copies from Naruto's Infamous Prankster File, which again was several large file boxes in size.

Even Konohamaru was astounded at his Boss's exploits and was slowly winning Jiraiya over towards creating a non-smut biography of Naruto's pranks, in his memory and if only for his family. The non-smut was the sticking point. For some of Naruto's pranks, which comprised three large black labeled file boxes, the contents were tantamount to national security breaches, which Naruto had performed to show those snooty tribes, families and agencies that they weren't as good at everything as they said they were, which also showed studied infiltration and sabotage routes, and points of crippling interest.

Where Naruto had almost mythic mastery over the Shadow Clone technique, Gaara had near complete control over sand, and he lived in a desert. So to honor his deceased brother's memory, though there was always some part of him which was vehement about Naruto's continued existence, Gaara made sand...sculptures. And messages. And...things. Quirky things holding special significance to select parties. He also became not only very physically affectionate, to Temari's ultimate pleasure (she missed hugging Gaara as a small child, so was making up for lost time) but also a bit strange while on assignment.

He took to asking 'sink or swim' questions to captives. He would take them singly for interrogation and ask them, rather pointedly, what they thought of one Uzumaki Naruto of Konoha. If they expressed confusion, they lived and were eventually returned home. If they expressed fondness, they were formerly requested to join either Wind, Wave or Fire. With any other response, especially of the negative sort, they were ruthlessly and enthusiastically made into gritty jelly. Kankuro's brain shut down for weeks at the mere notion of Gaara _not _killing someone 'just cause,' and also for using Naruto as the bellwether between who lived and died.

Gaara had the strange notion one day to learn even more about Naruto. This led to a hastily called meeting between himself and his siblings, Tsunade and her staff, including Hinata, and the Wave contingent of Iruka, Tazuna, Ayame and Tsunami to prevent Gaara from burying Konoha in a few hundred feet of sand with additional fifty foot drifts in retaliation for Naruto's treatment as an orphaned child. The premise was simple: Konoha is walled; Fill it. This also led to Gaara's exposure to Jiraiya, Naruto's Godfather and unofficial uncle. And his books.

Gaara's brain melted.

And he quickly became not only hooked and shamelessly addicted, but also filled a starring role in Jiraiya's following books for the next few years as a sort of surrogate Godson. One of his better known roles was as Naruzi's (Naruto's) sidekick in Icha Icha: Gritty Jobs Pay Best. And its sequels. He became very popular in Suna, and one of the first things he did upon learning of his female fan club was to build a shrine in honor of Naruto, promising to enjoy for his brother the affection neither knew as children.

* * *

The formerly shy Hyuuga Hinata had blossomed into a deadly force and a true Heiress, and had replaced Sakura as Tsunade's apprentice later in that first year. It wasn't for any apparent lack on Sakura's part, just that Hinata was more driven to succeed, and her Byakugan, knowledge of herbs, coils, chakra points, nerve clusters, chakra pool, chakra control and basic personality were things against which Sakura could not compete.

One of her fully supported side-projects as Tsunade's apprentice was to continue Tsunade's initial program of combat field medicine in Wave, as well as a general overhaul of their civilian hospital to include chakra and seal based operation theaters for shinobi injuries or civilian operations which would be too invasive or exploratory. Part of her duties included the instruction of combat medicine under Shizune to augment teams in Rice, Wave and Wind 'hardship' forts, which also served as border posts.

After Tsunade had allowed Shizune and herself to sign the Slug Contract, they had an almost instant communication route regardless of distance or location should an emergency or serious question arise. One of her more personally satisfying memories was when she greeted her class in advanced field medicine and saw the peculiar head of one Haruno Sakura, who tried to look as inconspicuous as one can with bubblegum pink hair once she saw the pale violet eyes of one Hyuuga Hinata lock on to her own deep greens. Hinata had rediscovered her live demonstration partner.

And after the presumptive official news from Cloud of Kyuubi's (of which she was well aware from Hyuuga council and arrogant villager proclamations) mating with Nibi's container to produce 'Lightning's Fire Extinguisher' prior to Naruto's death, she took little time to extinguish that rumor. She also found some final closure from her attempted kidnap at the hands of a Cloud ambassador when she was five.

The surprise usage of a large scale demolition jutsu within their Kage Tower amounted to one Kage and immediate family, a complete village council, 5 BOLTS, 3 Elite Jounin, one civilian secretary, three foodstalls, and two pig farmers being killed directly or indirectly. For the Nibi container, Hinata found far too many resemblances between Naruto and Yugito and offered a place as her personal assistant, a position Yugito found lucrative with one of Hinata's glowing finger tips not a hair's breath from Yugito's left eye, and her other hand, even more heavily chakra laden, poised to make demonic brain stew with a single tap.

* * *

Iruka had stayed in Wave and was making great strides in forming civilian and shinobi academies, as well as rooms for adults to continue their educational pursuits, or to share and learn new skills. Towards this end, he was slowly developing several D class and lower general and elemental Ninjutsu skills. He was also working on some new C and B class jutsu's, purely for the civilian sector which would ultimately be taught to others, pending chakra control and intention. Towards that end, Inari was a godsend, as he possessed not only a pranksters's mentality, but also a deep loyalty and ability to _read_ intent. He would make for the perfect apprentice for Iruka's naval skills and summons.

It was odd really, knowing the history of Team Seven and Wave, that Inari had felt viscerally violent towards them and had required sedation. He later confessed to Iruka, that even though he sought non-lethal resolutions to conflict, he had wanted nothing more than to burn Team Seven alive while impaled on rough hewn, green stakes just for the additional expansion and splinterage factors, using very low ranked fire techniques so the experience would last longer. Inari was stunned at that part of his personality, and it took several long discussions with Iruka to realize that such was okay, so long as you didn't act upon it. And if you did, at least you felt guilt, if only for the trees.

* * *

Shortly after the Konoha forces returned to the village and during the transition of integrating Water's forces into Konoha's military, the quiet Ichiraku Ramen Stand, long time Naruto supporters and Konoha residents, as well as a locally infamous landmark, packed up, got their papers in order, and left for Wave. There, Teuchi and his teen daughter Ayame found Naruto's famous bridge, a bustling and growing town, and not a single ramen stand in view. A place where Naruto was loved and treated as a rightful Hero with no immediate business competition.

It didn't take long to buy a plot of land, build a stand, and start the noodles boiling. Ayame even found and integrated fresh catches for their patented Naruto fishcakes (curry and paprika orange maelstrom swirls) and one of their very first customers was none other than Iruka, accompanied by Inari and Tazuna. In Wave, they could proudly display the small Kitsune shrine without fear of retaliation, as the most prominent family in Wave had named their child after Inari, the God of Foxes, Industry and Success.

By the end of that first year after Naruto's death, Iruka had had long discussions with Tsunade, Tazuna, Inari, the Council, Teuchi, Ayame and Tsunami and ultimately it was decided that Umino Iruka be permitted the Clan Restoration Act and had wed Ayame and Tsunami, which had the side bonus of closer national ties with Fire and Konoha due to Tsunade being another of Naruto's unofficial moms and the office of Hokage having close personal ties with one of Wave's premier families.

Since Iruka was Naruto's unofficial dad, Tsunami one of his unofficial moms, Ayame his unofficial sister and Inari an unofficial brother, the newly instated Umino Clan was a little bit complicated when it came to Naruto and familial roles. Except for Tazuna, as he could easily be anyone's favorite drunken uncle. They all felt Naruto would have both encouraged and blessed the unions of some of his most favorite and precious peoples.

It was a very good time to be a Sea Dolphin in Wave.


	4. Buns in the oven

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

It was during the second year of his incarceration (though he was unaware), months after he had reached an agreement with the Honorable Councilors, that he awoke one day to his door being opened, accompanied by the sound of something rolling across the fitted and worn flagstones. Then, for the second time in his life, the first being Hatake's ass poke technique during the Bell Test, Naruto felt violated. His modesty panel was lifted and something was slipped over his limp penis. Then his world exploded and continued for the next eight hours straight as the device attuned itself to his body.

The attendants were flabbergasted and not a little aroused, until they remembered what they were dealing with. But even then, some thoughts lingered. Naruto was truly a stamina monster. The device was labeled a success and he had drained the chakra battery three times, which was sufficient to milk a good eight hundred head of dairy cows with each depletion.

Once the device was acclimated to Naruto's unique chakra signature, it could latently recharge the chakra batteries purely from his exuded chakra. The pump's tubes passed through a recently created hole in the dense stone wall to a collection receptacle. From there, it was off to testing and implementation.

The downside was the obvious nutritional and hydration demands this latest technology demanded. No longer was tube feeding sufficient, although his output far exceeded any expectation. The Elder Councilors knew the material was highly time sensitive and were quick to test and freeze each batch until they could complete the trial tests on eggs harvested from every subject before moving on to in vitro fertilization.

By the time they discovered the primary ingredient in Naruto's replenishment diet, Ichiraku's had already been established in Wave for seven weeks and they had to resort to cheap cup ramen, as his body proved highly resilient to anything else when it came to ramen or any other food. This led to his attendants, all of which were highly trained, field and battle hardened ANBU, to become little more than water boilers. They all learned to hate the three minutes needed for cup ramen to cook.

At first, his nutritional needs led to the lower half of Naruto's hood being removed. With the hydration and usage from eating, he slowly relearned speech and would politely thank his attendants for every meal, bath and positional shift. He was strangely silent when it came to the pump. His attendants shortly discovered, through testing and trials, that his semen needed a requisite amount of starch and raw sugars to be viable.

The latent potency in each tailed head consumed energy at a fiendish pace, almost as much as an Akimichi at a free barbeque buffet. This led to random feedings, replete with water boilings and three-minute waits and hand feedings during all hours of the day. Since the Ichirakus were no longer around, his attendants were press-ganged into this latest unsavory duty, but so long as production was kept to at least specified levels, they would not be visited by questioning Elder Councilors. Hopefully, the prisoner would soon be allowed to feed himself, but as of yet the orders had not come down to release his fingers, hands and arms from their restraints.

They removed the pump after a month of near constant usage. Since it was powered by his chakra, it was attuned to his body and would activate whenever it sensed the prisoner was capable of production. None of them ever spoke of their duties to others nor did they speak in Naruto's presence. To do so would be instant death at the hands of an enraged Hokage and Hyuuga apprentice.

And to tell Danzou, the head of the black ops Root Division, that would entail the erasure of their entire extended family, even up to five times removed. They and their ancestors would be expunged from the annuls and monuments, either erased completely or relabeled as the worst trash eating traitors in all education material. Their current relations would be terminated with extreme prejudice. Their lines would cease to be.

Then there was the oddity of the room itself. It didn't start out as one of the most secure prisons in the Elemental Nations. Originally, it was built by Senju Hashirama when he created the village of Konoha as an exercise room for himself and his brother, Tobirama, as well as a holding pen for any of the super crazy powered shinobi which seemed to walk the earth during that earlier time.

Due to the nature of the seal imbued stone, chakra wasn't just suppressed. In fact, one could still sense their own chakra within themselves; they just could not access or mold it, though some seals could be easily modified to allow for trickles of focused chakra for control exercises. The seals also prevented energy based entry, such as Body Flickers or summonings and hid any occupants' energy signature. If one was outside the door, any type of scan would show the room beyond to be empty.

All this made this room a favorite training tool for the prior Hokages, as one could practice hand seals for any technique, at any speed, without fear of any actual chakra molding or usage, or physical interruption. This meant that even the most demanding, draining or forbidden technique could be safely learned and practiced in almost perfect seclusion.

It was discovered by Horuma and Koharu when they followed their old teammate, Sarutobi the Third Hokage, to learn how he maintained his internal library of literally thousands of techniques. Hatake may have copied a thousand techniques with his stolen Sharingan eye, but could only use the version he copied. Sarutobi, on the other hand, learned thousands from initial theory and mechanics through family variations, even breaking the techniques down to their most basic forms to create new techniques. He wasn't called the Professor and Shinobi God for nothing, and he used this room to practice.

For someone with Kage level chakra reserves, such as Naruto who lacked the control to personally suppress his chakra signature, it was the perfect holding facility. Except for his errant teammates, the secret died when Sarutobi did as the most recent Hokage had no idea that this room and her unofficial son were underneath her very feet. Then again, back when the Third used that room for training, it didn't have a small hole through the dense stone wall leading to the hall outside.

* * *

As for another bloodline, there was still little hope. There was some thought, however, that if they could prod the Sharingan to the second to last phase, they could convince the lone pseudo-loyal Uchiha to make more Uchihas. He was far too beloved, even now, to incarcerate and pump dry. Quite besides which, they still needed to see how the initial trials would turn out.

The pump itself was an overwhelming success and was currently being mass-produced for the dairy industry. Soon, they could employ fresh Genins in D-ranks to recharge those batteries, which could prove to be a rather eloquent chakra control exercise, not to mention an introduction to elemental lightning usage, as well as a village coffer filler from the increased production yield and profit from those dairy farms.

They might even have to change the Academy curriculum to something more akin to Wave's style, which focused less on academic and more on theoretical and practical exercises for the new crop of students. Iruka was quickly becoming an academic revolutionary, even including basic chakra exercises for civilians and incorporating the basics of ninjutsu and taijutsu, as well as how to cancel or break genjutsu. Iruka knew that some people just were not cut out to be shinobi, who otherwise might have very good shinobi-class skills. Why waste that potential when it could be directed into the civilian trade sectors?

Iruka could easily envision forges using simple fire jutsus, weavers using wind, farmers using water for irrigation, lightning providing electrical power and construction crews using earth, even up to groups of them dredging bays and harbors. To Iruka, the consummate teacher, Ninjutsu had more than just battlefield value. And if he had his way, Wave would flourish, just like Naruto would have wanted.

Besides, it _was _in his honor as Naruto was the one who taught Iruka how to think 'outside the box'. And since Wave was technically part of Fire, he could easily rationalize any betrayal guilt away. If nothing else, he could always call himself a dual-citizen.

* * *

Uchiha Sasuke was not a happy camper. This is comparatively speaking to even the Sasuke two years ago, just prior to his attempted defection. If even possible, he was more disgruntled. His measuring stick was gone, alleged to have been killed in a fight with the Number Two man of his supposed benefactor; his memory wasn't too clear on the matter. The one who promised him power to defeat _Him_. Dead at the hands of supposedly weak and ineffective and useless old people, the former teammates which Orochimaru had cast aside in his personal quest for Ninjutsu knowledge and forbidden immortality.

He knew, at least on some levels, that Orochimaru wanted him only for the power of his eyes, the ability to see and copy any Nin, Tai or Genjutsu and replicate it, such having been burned into neural muscle memory and remembered for life. That bloodline in no way granted the knowledge, theory or mechanics of the skill or technique, just what ever version of said skill or technique was being performed at the time of the Sharingan's activation.

The Uchiha's had an inclination towards high intelligence, so unlike Hatake's transplanted eye, a true Uchiha was trained in critical thinking skills and could infer or extrapolate. They may not know completely how a technique worked, but they could deduce nuances or slight variations on almost an instinctual level. Not to mention the genetic disposition; it was why the Sharingan belonged to the Uchiha Clan, not the Hatake.

However, Sasuke had never met someone quite like Naruto, who would use any technique, from any field, for any purpose. All while making it look not only natural, as if that was the original intent behind the technique in the first place, but also good. He could always pull off anything, and that fact never failed to rub Sasuke the wrong way. _He _was the Elite, _He _was the Uchiha, _He _should have the gift of making everything done look good. With aplomb, dammit!

Granted, he never stopped his fan-girl teammate from damaging the boy, as he couldn't imagine the sound of her enhanced fist impacting the boy's skull to be a good thing. He didn't show favor either, as that would only serve to encourage said fan-girl to commit even more damage upon the blond rationale for his enhanced Sharingan. The blond idiot proved to be even more versatile than imagined on every single mission, even the D ranks.

Against all odds, even for those...chores, Naruto saw them as further training, especially for elemental affinities. For some reason, after that remark Team 7 made a new yet completely uncontested record of cat recoveries, far surpassing even Team Gai's prior record, which strangely Gai never mentioned in his weekly Hatake/Rival contests. Never again would they weed a garden (Earth), paint a house (Water and Wind), do a controlled field burn (Fire and Wind), or recharge and maintain a chakra battery array (Lightning). Instead, they did what Naruto hated, mammal control: catching mammals, walking mammals, babysitting mammals.

He also had no qualms about insults. As far as he knew, Naruto was an orphan of peasant class, one who should know their place in society's structure. Sasuke knew in the bone that the Uchiha were virtually nobility, grudgingly alongside the Hyuuga, which made everyone else beneath them. As in servile. The fact that Uzumaki dared to look him in the eye while speaking was an affront to common decency.

Surely someone, at some time, had taught the boy social rights and wrongs, but he seemed to have ignored every lesson. In that, he was actually thankful for Sakura, as Sasuke figured he would only tire himself and gain split knuckles from teaching the boy his place. Why bother himself when he has a rather willing surrogate?

But now he was gone. Simply gone, no longer there, vanished. There wasn't even conclusive proof he was dead. Or living. It was almost as if he had never existed at all, and Sasuke might have convinced himself it was all a delusional fantasy had he not heard so many villagers happy and glad that the blond maelstrom was no longer around.

Sasuke was confused and pretty much lost. Kakashi had tried to entice him with techniques to copy. After all, his sensei was internationally known as the Copycat of 1000 Techniques. But without someone to gloat _at_, it just wasn't worth it. Sure, he could gloat and feel superior to Sakura and Sai, but that was too easy. It was like using his Sharingan, chakra enhanced limbs, and a Henge to dominate a Little League Softball game, which he had done once during a fit of pique.

Ultimately, he was left unsatisfied. Even spars with Kiba left him with longing. As Hinata would tell him, if he ever deigned to speak with her, there was no substitute for Naruto. So even if Kiba was brash, uncouth and arrogant, there was something intrinsically 'Naruto-ish' missing. And that just took all the fun out of it.

Recently though, he had been in talks with the Elder Councilors about a Council seat. Normally, on the Shinobi side, that meant being a Clan Head, but one couldn't really be a Clan Head for a clan of one. They had alluded to and hinted at possible usage of the cursed Uchiha estate for the betterment of Konoha, and how he could prosper in multiple ways, even the realization of the Uchiha Secret, something he felt had died alongside Naruto.

They told him of a way he could gain a new best friend for his bloodline fulfillment. How they knew of that, he was unsure, but the possible light at the end of the tunnel was blinding. Even with Naruto gone, he might just have a way to defeat _Him_, the brother who cursed Sasuke to solitude and made him live in weakness, lacking hatred. If he scratched their backs, they would scratch his, and with Orochimaru and Naruto gone, he figured that was the best deal he was ever going to get.

* * *

Sakura had started off not having a good time. She had been replaced by Hinata as Tsunade's apprentice, who was accorded all the rights and privileges of a Legend's apprentice, and then made into a live-fire demonstration dummy by Hinata during class, spars, or whenever Sakura badmouthed Naruto's memory. To top it all off, Hinata's practical medical knowledge far surpassed Sakura's. Hinata could even fix a malfunctioning pancreas, ending Type I diabetes, and was currently working on a genetic fix for Type II, or Adult Onset.

However, Sakura wasn't top of the academy in book smarts for nothing. She had a knack for research, theory and for figuring out puzzles. She was a perfect candidate for genome mapping and was placed as the head of the paternity ward. Hinata couldn't see an undeveloped chakra system found in the newly born, and this is where Sakura's partially photographic memory came into play. It was strange, really. If she read it, and it dealt with medicine or science, she could remember it word for word and parse the syntax. Anything else and she would struggle to recall. Were it not for her above average IQ, she would be a medical idiot savant.

If not for Naruto, she and Hinata would be the perfect team. Hinata was practical, Sakura was theoretical. But without Naruto, Hinata would have never blossomed into this current powerhouse. And to be completely honest, without Naruto, Sakura would have never weathered the harsh rejections from Sasuke or the barbs from Ami or Ino. He was always there to ask her out, making her feel wanted and important (even if it was all imagined).

If she had thought of it more at the time, she might have found it almost creepy that he was always there whenever she needed someone to lift her spirits. There were even times she would be sulking in her room, fresh from another Ino debasement and suddenly, there would be Naruto's annoying voice from outside, begging for a date, or begging someone not to hurt him. The point was that he was begging. It was almost like he knew she needed cheering.

Were it not for him, she would have never considered medicine, since he was the one that made her mother cry, which led to Sakura wanting to avenge the Haruno honor; and also made Sasuke human, and therefor prone to injury, which would mean removing his shirt and possibly his pants. This was brought home during that month long Wave mission, when Sasuke was put in a Near Death state by Haku's senbons.

Eventually, Sasuke had to bribe Naruto to buy him new pants, as his kept vanishing whenever he awoke during the recovery period. It was this experience which led to her decision to learn advanced medical techniques so that she could be an even greater asset to her team (Sasuke) and aid them (Sasuke) whenever they were injured (Naruto-baka!) and to remove said injury (Sasuke's pants) with all due speed (KWAIII!). Naruto gave her motivation on all fronts.

She knew the Secret as well. Distasteful as it might seem, as least on a few of her levels, Naruto's DNA was to be implanted into willing hosts. Had she known where he was being kept, she would have marched down to his solitary holding cell and beat him senseless for being an ad-hoc pervert. Even though a part of her knew it wasn't really his fault, that he was innocent of all charges and was being held quite against his will, the rest of her asserted it was his fault ultimately. He had dared to hurt her family and upstage Sasuke! She deeply suspected that he was not only proud of the hurt he caused, but was most likely drooling at his perverted success of impregnating hundreds of unsuspecting women, rubbing his nipples and moaning as the suction pump...

Where the hell did all that come from and was she aroused? Time to think Sasuke thoughts! Mmmm..tall, pale and angsty...what? She must be tired, staring at the pips and dots on the latest chart which showed a consistent and potent bloodline limit, all from Konoha's resident pariah. Extremely high stamina, massive chakra pools from birth, abnormally strong immune system and physical regenerative abilities. If only the village knew, and if only she could tell.

The Council had roped her in. She had let herself _be_ roped in with all the promises of power and prestige. It was during the long nights of work-induced isolation that she would ponder her absent teammate, and she realized she knew nothing about him. Even her own memories, and she had a pretty good memory, of her childhood showed things were not quite like she had believed. Not even close.

She had been conditioned by her mother to hold a grudge, and then conditioned by Ino to be Ino with a Haruno grudge. She needed someone to talk with, felt the need to tell, and feared the consequences for herself and her mother. Had the Elders waited a month or so, they would have had to deal with Hinata as Tsunade's apprentice, and Sakura had no illusions on what would have happened when it came to Naruto with Hinata. Despite their potency and council power, Hinata would have liquidated them, quite literally.

On top of all that, she was also striving for legitimacy and security for her mother. They were the only Harunos left. Most of all the rest, shinobi and civilians, were wiped out during the Third Shinobi War and the Kyuubi attack took out the remainders. Before all that, they had been a very minor shinobi family. It took quite some time to research all that out. She knew her family had gifts: an acutely focused memory, and a dual mind making them almost impervious to most genjutsus and other mind controlling techniques.

They were almost the perfect foil to the Yamanakas. This also made them feared illusion masters, when a gift for Genjutsu aligned with their dual nature impervious to Genjutsu. Such a combination rarely happened though. Sometimes they were Taijutsu masters, Seal masters, Ninjutsu masters, or complete masters of a specific civilian trade, but were completely worthless when it came to other non-related skills or paths. If they were gifted with Genjutsu, they were inept in Tai, Nin, or Seals and all domestic trades.

That's not to say they couldn't learn; they just found such to be inordinately difficult, almost akin to diametrically opposed elemental affinities. But they had to train constantly so they would retain the skill, otherwise, it would fade quickly with time. Conversely, in whatever skill their memory favored, they could glance once at a page and recall it perfectly, even fifty years later, including the subtle nuances of the author's writing style. For Sakura, she was attuned to theoretical medicine, and she was well on her way towards being the ultimate authority on medical theory.

For the past year, she had been highly concerned about Sasuke's mental state as he was seen brooding even more than was normal, and became increasingly violently anti-social. Lately though, in the past few months, he had begun talking with her, as a teammate, about Naruto, the Team, his own thoughts and herself, though the latter was a rarity. But it was something new. Sasuke had never bothered himself with her personal thoughts before.

It was a very pleasant surprise given his lengthy history of romantic rejections and spurned friendships. She was even beginning to think, alongside a growing portion of the civilian population, that maybe Itachi scrambled his brain even more deeply than originally thought, that maybe it reached even into his personal gender preferences, that he secretly craved someone to substitute his older brother for sexual fulfillment. So it came as quite a relief when he began talking to her in a way which might have hinted at a deeper friendship later, one which valued her opinions and trusted her instincts. Perhaps, perhaps she could talk with Sasuke about all this, and come up with some sort of exit strategy.

If only she knew him like she thought she did.

* * *

Unknown to the last 'loyal' Uchiha, there were things afoot within the cursed Uchiha sector, which was more akin to a village within a village, even having its own defensive walls which abutted with the village's. It was here where the defeated Sound and Water groups made their new homes, and where transplants from Wave and refugees from Rain were housed.

It was also the spot for the first medical large scale experiment of its kind. Sure, Orochimaru had done some genetic experimentation, but only on a very small scale, often in batches less than twenty. What the Elder Councilors attempted was in the nature of hundreds of candidates from Sound, Rain, Wave, Water, Wind and Fire.

They had tested sample eggs from every test subject, and all had tested positive for cellular division and viability, partially erasing a fear that being the Kyuubi host would make the semen toxic. They wouldn't know for certain until any resulting newborn could be thoroughly examined for defects. Towards that end, though it took many hours, every willing subject was fertilized the following February, during the third year of Naruto's incarceration.

A few days after the procedure, the test subjects were given the option to leave the program if they so chose, and could leave at anytime up to the first trimester. There were no takers, even when some were tested by dropping Naruto's name as the host father; none of them backed out. Out of hundreds, not a single person chose to terminate, nor were there any miscarriages and ultimately, no still births. Every subject, down to the woman, was almost vehement in being allowed to carry their child full term, even going so far as to attack an official with pinkish hair when she mentioned 'forced pre-birth.'

The council, especially the Elders, did not know, but a faction had quickly grown after the first procedures were completed. Even though they were impregnated via artificial methods, that did not seem to stop their bodies from recognizing certain sensitive sensual locations. To the woman, they 'suffered' full on orgasms several times a day for the full nine months and seeing how no other man could touch them, thanks again to the Council, they fought tooth and nail to prevent the Council from taking those toe-curling, eye fluttering, thigh clenching, moaned scream inducing orgasms. Several times a day.

It just wasn't going to happen. Well, maybe if the test subject numbered in the few. Then they could be squirreled away quickly without notice. But several hundred healthy and fit women (some kunoichi) who were kept isolated from a man's touch so as not to endanger the experiment? Think again.

They were kept by themselves, only tended by other females and had none to talk with but themselves. They compared notes, journals and diaries and found some had more...episodes than others and why they had more than others. This led to training regimens for the rest so they could experience as many episodes as the other women. That led to even more episodes, some having upwards of seven or eight full blown orgasms per day.

Through it all, this was a closely guarded secret. The test group had no illusions to what the Council or village would do had they known that the group of women not only knew that one Uzumaki Naruto was the host father, but that a veritable cult had grown around his legacy in Wave, which had spread to a certain ward in Konoha's Uchiha district.

The irony was almost palpable.

* * *

**AN: D rank elemental exercises inspired by Perfect Lionheart's 'Chunin Exam Day', Chapter 54.**


	5. Pandora's Box

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

The Uchiha sector was odd, in that it was literally a village within a village. Behind its own security wall, close to sixteen thousand Uchihas could be safely housed and sustained, fed from their own fields, supported by their own infrastructure, protected by their own militia and Shinobi force. There had never been that many Uchiha though, as for many years in the clan's history, Uchiha hunting had been a popular sport among the other elemental nations. Once captured and their precious eyes removed for transplant, the prior owners would be press-ganged into teaching their techniques and siring more Uchihas.

One of the primary directives of the Uchiha Greater Council was that every captured Uchiha, along with any broods, be exterminated, so even if there had been others with Uchiha genetics running around, the secrets of bloodline activation were never discovered. There was also the factor that if the bloodline did not activate before the advent of puberty, the Sharingan would remain dormant for life as the influx of chemicals and growth stimuli during puberty would neutralize it. It was still genetically there, and could be passed on to offspring, but if not activated by the onset of puberty, it never would be. There were, of course, some very rare exceptions, but those were normally disregarded as anomalies.

As for the transplanted eyes, in the medical history of optical transplants to non-Uchiha, Hatake Kakashi was the only success as Uchiha Obito gave his own eye willingly, with love and respect to help his teammate. Obito gave willingly with positive emotions and intent, and that was the secret for a successful non-Uchiha eye transplant. Sadly, the secret died with Obito.

Konoha, and the majority of the forests of Fire Country, were created by a massive seal dozens of miles in diameter constructed by the Senju clan and powered by the clans that wanted to live in this new village in this consolidated country. As they gave, so they got, as those clans who had more bodies to pump more chakra into the seal array would gain more land inside the walls to call their own, to establish their clans.

The Uchiha, at the time, threw themselves into the task, even willingly sacrificing lives to extreme chakra exhaustion, the last dregs of their spiritual being going into the seal. This was by design, a plan crafted by Madara, to gain a large initial foothold, reinforce it, and self-sustain it. When the time was right, the clan would secede from Konoha and become its own walled village within and protected by the walls of Konoha, with the ultimate goal of 'conquering' internally through gifts, bribes and real estate acquisitions through intermediaries. The ultimate goal was to make Konoha a village of Uchiha, with the other clans in direct servitude, before marching on Fire's capital city and claiming the country for their own, under their banner.

The first coup failed and Madara was exiled. There was tentative peace while the Uchiha garnered more support and offered their services to the Village as the police force/internal militia. The Second Hokage, Senju Tobirama, accepted their offer and the Uchiha Police were born, further cementing their hold on the village. A second coup was in the works during Sarutobi's reign, with the opening salvo in the form of the Kyuubi no Kitsune being summoned, mind-screwed, and directed towards Konoha during the brief reign of Namikaze Minato, the Fourth Hokage.

The revolution was to happen during the resulting confusion, but was delayed by a series of mistakes. The plan was discovered, an insider was located, and the existing Uchiha clan, numbering around three hundred total, with a further eight hundred servants and retainers, was exterminated by order of the Hokage. Actually, the order had been to exterminate the Uchiha council, but Itachi deliberately misunderstood as he had finally found the perfect way to test himself.

The grounds had been vacant and rumored cursed for the better part of seven years, when it was turned into a refugee/integration camp following the Sound campaign, then augmented by the Wave defense. With the captured came the willing, bringing their skills and crafts with them. Within that first year, the Uchiha sector was brought back to life rather quickly after a rash of new construction and old repair, all overseen by a rather well paid Tazuna from Wave.

One rebuilt section was ostensibly a medical ward for quarantine, just in case of outbreak or some attacking force using biological agents or dead bodies as ammunition, and Tazuna followed the required specification making minor changes to the blueprints to provide a little bit more comfort and recreation. He figured that even quarantine patients would like basic amenities, such as parks, reading materials and educational services, since there was never any telling how long the quarantine would last. It was constructed to house three thousand in reasonable comfort and accommodations, while keeping them separate from the rest of the village for safety and medical reasons.

Currently, it was partially occupied.

* * *

Halfway through third year of Naruto's incarceration, he had a visitor. After the pump was removed, the oral feedings ceased and his jaw strap was re-secured. Up until this visit, things had reverted to like they had been prior to the pump: occasional 'baths' and intravenous feeding. Though he was still securely strapped to the spa table thing, he tried to maintain his muscles through dynamic tension, the tensing and contracting of the muscle groups. It wasn't much, but it was better than slowly wasting away, though a part of him saw it as merely prolonging the inevitable. But then he had a visit.

It all began with an annoyed grunt.

**'Wha?'**

Naruto was instantly in his mindspace. He had taken to spending a lot of time in here, watching Kyuubi in his unwaking slumber, as well as going through memories and studying things he had once read and had 'forgotten.' Over the past few years, he had been slowly re-educating himself, though he was limited to those books and scrolls he had actually been allowed to read, so there wasn't much of a selection. Better than nothing though, and in his mind, he could still go through kata drills, hand seals; he could do anything and everything except improve physically in his mind. It was how he passed the time, since he had long lost any concept of time, spending his hours just flexing his mind.

"Kyuubi-sama, you're awake!"

**"Sama? Since when did you become respectful, whelp?"**

"It has been a long time that I've been here, and I have reviewed my ways in life and found them lacking. I seek counsel and a new path."

**"I will not kill you for now, as you have shown your worth before. Tell me speck, tell me where we are for I sense something is amiss."**

"Prison, Kyuubi-sama."

**"What? How did...what did...for the first time in ages, words fail to express my outrage. Kami, you big breasted bitch, I despise your sense of irony. The prison for the prisoner imprisoned. That is rich!"**

"It's not my fault, Kyuubi-sama!"

**"What do you mean 'It's not my fault'? Whose else could it be, speck? Do not think me a fool, for I will not be treated as such by you nor any other!"**

"But Kyuubi-sama, if it were not I, and it were not you..."

**"Stop right there. Begin from the beginning, speck, and leave naught out or I will find a way to make your life worse. Have faith that I will find a way."**

So began the retelling of finding Tsunade, the Sannin battle, the kidnapping and escape, running into Sasuke, and meeting his sensei. Kyuubi interjected and showed Naruto the other memories. Just because Naruto might be asleep or otherwise unconscious didn't mean Kyuubi was as well, and while there may not be visual, there were sounds and speech.

Kyuubi, for once, patiently explained sensations to the teen, such as the odd tugged feeling when Hatake had looped a rope over Naruto's chest and under his arms, then wound the ends around his own waist, and dragged Naruto through the forest while piggybacking his 'apprentice.' Naruto had his eyes opened at what had gone on, how facts were distorted, and how lies became truths. The final memory before Kyuubi woke was of Naruto getting an injection of something non-toxic and non-poisonous, since both of them were affected once the drugs took affect.

"So they lied. Everything was a lie and here I am, in here, for Kami knows how long."

**"Not everything was a lie. Due to me being sealed in you, you have potent gifts...kit."**

Naruto's eyes widened. "You called me kit! Does that mean..."

**"If you make any motion to get soppy on me, I'll go back to speck and snap your mind!"**

Naruto bowed his thanks. He knew what this was about. He was angry, furious at the injustice, and he would find a way out somehow, and when he did, there would be hell to pay. Kyuubi-sama would come along for the ride, and was basically giving his blessing and approval...and a little bit of respect. Naruto paused in mid-musing.

"Kyuubi-sama? Did you hear that?"

**"Hear what, kit? What do you think you heard?"** Kyuubi was cut off from Naruto's external senses and assumed that is what the teen meant.

"I thought I heard a heartbeat. It's faint though and it's not mine...wait...there's more. There's a lot more."

Kyuubi narrowed his eyes and took stock of his surroundings, spreading his senses inside instead of trying to spread them out. Then his eyes widened. **"Kit, I hear it as well. There are hundreds of heartbeats. I am not sure what this means, but it would appear that we have more than enough time in the world to ponder it."**

"Sadly, in this you are correct, Kyuubi-sama. If you will excuse me, I shall meditate on this."

* * *

'The subjects are healthy and viable. Test is entering its final stage.' That was what she had written, everything vague and non-incriminating. Sakura had spent the past week going over all of her reports, making sure there was no mention of actual names, nor any allusions, such as insults or nicknames. Candidate, subject, test, donor...safe words, neutral words, things.

She made them, those people, into things. She had to, otherwise she would be forced to think of them as people and if she did that, then she would have to admit that what she was doing and had done was wrong on too many levels to ignore. And she couldn't do it, afraid of the consequences, so those women, the unborn children, Naruto...they were all things. But not safe things, not by a long shot.

She still remembers the half-brick that had impacted her head early in the program. She had said something, something she couldn't remember now, but something which had really upset most of...scratch that, all of the women and one had chucked a half-brick. Not safe at all, and once the children were born, there would be no safe haven for her. Hinata would find her, extract the Secret, kill her slowly, send her to the brink and revive her, if only so Tsunade-sama could get her licks in as well.

Despite being children, babies, things, things which looked like babies, she couldn't kill them, not all of them. There were too many, and that wasn't even considering the things which looked like very angry mothers. She had, had to calm down and breathe, gather her wits, get a plan together. The subjects had just entered their third trimester, so that gave her only a few months before this experiment could no longer be hidden, until she would no longer be safe.

Sasuke had mentioned something about getting together tonight, dinner and maybe some conversation. Things were moving slowly, but at least they were moving. So maybe, maybe during the conversation part she could talk to him, tell him the Secret, get his help, escape. They could find and kill Itachi together and then, and then go...somewhere. There had to be other places than the Elemental Countries, so they could go there, somewhere the All Seeing Hyuuga Eyes could not reach, somewhere safe from a Juuken strike to the heart.

* * *

Haruno Sakura's body was found several hours later at the Bridge of Falling Blossoms, not too far from the Memorial Stone. In her hands was a small box containing a ring, and on her face was a look of shock and betrayal. A thin tanto was the other accessory, slid up at an angle in her back so that it not only pierced the heart, but impaled it. The predominant scent upon her, according to Inuzuka Kiba, Mitirashi Anko and a very reluctant Hatake Kakashi, belonged to none other than Uchiha Sasuke on the box, on her face and hands, and on the tanto's handle.

Kiba and Akamaru led the Hokage, Hinata, and Anko (Kakashi doing his own search with his nin-dogs) through the streets in a winding erratic pattern ending inside a fairly nondescript house. Inside they found Sasuke straddling Mitokado Homura's chest, stabbing a kunai into his ruined eyes while chanting, "Those who tell lies lose their eyes." in a sing-song fashion while rocking gently back and forth. Utatane Koharu was found behind an overturned table, throat slashed and her eyes gouged out. Hinata was quick to subdue him with Juuken strikes to the back, and that's when they got a good look at his face. He had apparently dug out his own eyes and tried to replace them with Koharu's.

Tsunade quickly summoned several ANBU teams and sent them to secure Homura and Kohura's council offices and their private residences, another to the Uchiha's apartments, and left the last to secure the crime scene as well as any papers once it was determined that this residence was a 'neutral' meeting room for the Elder Councilors. Hinata was dispatched to the hospital to secure Sakura's office, while Kiba and Akamaru transported the unconscious Uchiha to Interrogation, with Anko as their escort guard. Knowing Hatake's view of his student, she was to ensure he did not interfere.

Within a few hours, Tsunade was beginning to see the scope of the deception which had been played on so many, but there were too many questions left unanswered, at least for now. She had wept with Hinata upon learning that Naruto had not perished in Sound, but had been transported back to Konoha by Hatake before being heavily sedated and put on trial while she and Shizune had been at the Fire-Wind summit. It took Hinata and several slug summons' combined effort to convince Tsunade against researching Orochimaru's Impure Resurrection Technique to bring the Councilors and that pinkette bitch back from the dead so they could be killed over and over again.

On the reports filed by the Councilors on a captured missing-nin, unnamed, Haruno's signature was there as a Witness; however, they then found Haruno's report where she had signed as the Hokage's Representative for the same case number. They weren't quite sure what the Uchiha's role in all this had been, aside from being the initial catalyst, but one thing was becoming abundantly clear: they knew. Sakura, the girl Tsunade had begun training during the Sasuke recovery mission, knew all this time, she knew how much Naruto meant to Tsunade and had said _nothing_.

Kakashi was the one who brought Naruto back, literally dragged him back with a hole in the boy's chest and knew he was alive and had said _nothing_. This was the third year of Naruto's incarceration and they were no closer to finding him than they had been before. They would have to keep searching the recovered reports, diaries and notes as they were brought in for inspection. In the meantime, since Hinata had already summoned some slugs, they sent a message to Shizune, who was overseeing an Advanced Med-Nin exit examination in Wave, to continue testing, then to stand by for further instructions.

And then a fresh batch of paperwork landed on her desk, and right on top was a request from Hatake for medical leave citing emotional distress at the complete loss of his team 'who were like family,' in addition to a request for a travel pass to Spring Country. She quickly called for Jiraiya, knowing he was 'research' gathering at Public Onsen Seven. Once he arrived, she didn't even waste time with her version of physical affection, instead opting for showed him the reports, Hatake's requests and giving her idea for appropriate punishment. Reluctantly, he agreed, his hesitancy due to his wanting to go out and kill the Cyclops personally, and began work on the seal array.

* * *

Sasuke wasn't sure where he was. He knew who he was, that was ingrained deep in his psyche, but not exactly where. They had lied to him, they did. They had whispered to him of the Secret, the Secret of Eyes, the ways and means to kill _Him_. They lied and gave up their eyes. They had him find a new friend, not Naruto-friend, but other friend and he had, he had gone out and found another friend. Sakura, fan-girl, banshee, the only one who never left him like the others, like the weak and worthless.

Only Sakura was there at the end, at the end of a line of traitors, betrayers, fair weather friends. For he needed a friend, the sacred texts, the secret texts mandated a friend or loved one, a trusted one, sacrificed for the eyes to defeat _Him_. To advance his eyes he must slay a friend or kin so he had. He proposed, saw her happy, kissed her and felt something thrill within him as he slid the blade in and up, feeling her small, compact breasts push into him as her eyes looked like his heart, hurt and betrayed. He knew then they were bound at the soul as the life left her dusty green eyes.

But they had lied. His eyes had not changed, not changed, were the same. He checked and checked and poked and prodded but they did not change. His eyes wept for the first time in ages, wept red hot tears at the shame of being tricked. They had lied to _him_, to the Uchiha, to a dead clan howling for vengeance they had lied. So he went to them he did, he tracked them, he found them and took from them _their _eyes, he took them and made them his, his eyes, not their's! For those who tell lies lose their eyes!

* * *

At 06:00 the following day, for one of the few times in his illustrious and infamous history, Hatake Kakashi was on time for a meeting with the Hokage. As he stood before her desk, he answered her questions about his request and she agreed with his reasons, granting him a month for medical recuperation in Spring Country as she reclined in her executive chair.

"One more thing before you go, Kakashi."

"Yes, Hokage-sama?"

"Seal." And her bare foot, which had been stretched under the desk touched the edge of the carpet under Hatake's feet. There was a large puff of smoke, and where Hatake had once stood, there was now the symbol for 'Person' stitched in the rug's fabric in the center of one of Jiraiya's more clever seal arrays.

"Kotetsu, Izumo." The two chuunins blurred into being. "If you would, please replace this rug. It has been here for far too long, and there's no telling if someone has implanted special seals within the fibers. I wouldn't put it past that bastard, Danzou!"

"Hai, Hokage-sama. What shall we do with it?"

She knew that storage seals created pocket dimensions, but nobody really knew what happened to those stored items if the storage matrix was destroyed. That was a topic for fierce scholastic debate. She was tempted to just have the rug thrown into storage and forgotten, but Hatake had lied to her. More than that, _he_ was the one who dragged Naruto to Konoha from the Valley of the End. _He_was the one who filed the initial charges. _He_was the one who gave the report that Naruto died in Sound. _He_knew Naruto had been imprisoned and had known for three years. He _knew_. As far as she was concerned, he was hip deep in this conspiracy and a willing participant; she wasn't going to let him weasel his way out of it or get off lightly.

"Burn it."

* * *

By 10:00, Tsunade had in her hands the psychological evaluation of Uchiha Sasuke. What was missing was any input by any Yamanaka, who refused on the grounds of 'dangerous risk to self.' She really couldn't fault them for that, as the kid's mind was pretty screwed up to begin with thanks to Itachi, and there was no telling what sort of wards or traps either Sasuke or Itachi had put in place, or even which ones might be active.

Despite the overwhelming evidence of guilt, she knew there was still a strong faction in the Civilian Council who saw the cursed clan as royalty and would strive to protect the cretin from any death sentence. They wanted more Uchihas, to bring them back to a Golden Age or some other balderdash, and they could get that if he were imprisoned.

There had been something in the reports, something vague about one prisoner being the field test for genetic harvesting and an artificial insemination project to test the functionality of bloodline creation. The problem they had always faced before was getting that close to the incarcerated, close enough to extract a sample, without putting the guards at risk. There were no indications that the trials had progressed further than the brain-storming stage at present, but they still had several years' worth of notes to go through.

Given all the problems that clan had created, since even before the official founding of this village, the last thing Tsunade wanted or needed were more egotistical, arrogant and mentally disturbed Uchihas running around. She made decision and summoned Ibiki.

"Given that the brooding prince wanted Orochimaru's tongue wrapped around his pasty flesh, have him swallow his own."

Tsunade was treated to one of Ibiki's super rare smiles, the only other people to have ever received one being Anko and Naruto. He bowed low at the waist in a sign of deep respect and flickered away.

* * *

Hinata had gone into the hospital's Maternity Ward again, looking for information shortly after noon. Sakura's office had always been suspiciously clean and looked to have been rarely, if ever, used. She had spotted Sakura's personal assistant, who had been studiously trying to avoid Hinata for some reason and was quickly body tackled.

"I am Hyuuga Hinata, Left Hand of the Hokage, Senju Tsunade. You are Haruno Sakura's personal assistant, Hitsura Akasa. There has been a change in personnel, Akasa-san and you are now my new assistant. If you would be so kind, Akasa-san," began Hinata, a chakra scalpel humming over Akasa's right eye when the assistant tried to squirm away, "I would love to see my offices, as I'm sure there's another one more private. Perhaps you would like to take me there now?"

Akasa had been more than willing, but had made the mistake of trying to flee once Sakura's private office was revealed. She was currently en route to Interrogation with what Hinata was sure would be a very interesting story. Hinata, however, was going over the notes that hadn't been seized from Sakura's apartment, family residence and hospital office. Code names and generic labels were used instead of names or even species.

Some things were evident, however. Whatever Sakura had been working on, it was big, hidden in plain sight, and in the Uchiha district. Some construction had gone on there a year or so ago, but there was no indication of what had been built. She did recognize the name of the lead architect however, and quickly sent a slug off to Shizune with a request to ask Tazuna what construction he had overseen in the Uchiha district. The answer came back promptly: Medical Quarantine for three thousand, which was never reported to the Hokage, Council or hospital.

Another slug was summoned and dispatched to Tsunade, with a request to meet with Hinata at this location. Tsunade was there with two ANBU squads within fifteen minutes and it was Tsunade's turn to be amazed as she briefly poured through notes and logs. They left the ANBU there with explicit orders to secure the premises and to allow nothing to be destroyed, as Tsunade and Hinata went to pay a visit to the Uchiha district.

They had been here prior, multiple times, but usually in the main public gathering areas. Everyone here was a Konoha citizen and freely moved around, and it seems that most here knew of the quarantine sector and had assumed it was common knowledge, so never spoke of it. There hadn't been a quarantine notification, after all, and no excitement for almost a year. As far as the inhabitants were concerned, there was much more excitement in the village proper, with rumors about multiple murders the prior day floating around like embers, waiting to catch flame.

They found the wall marking the ward's boundary, and the ANBU who stood guard at the main and only gate. Tsunade and Hinata were quickly passed through, especially after it was discovered that the Hokage signatures on their orders were forgeries. On the inside they found women, hundreds of women, the majority of which were many months pregnant by the looks of things. They spent the rest of the afternoon performing scans, despite the statements that the 'pinkette' had already given them checkups yesterday. It was then that Hinata saw it.

She was certain the ladies here had thought it hidden, but as Hinata was examining one person's coils, she saw through the wall behind her and caught sight of a strange looking shrine. Further investigation, with the masses of women looking very worried and somewhat frightened, proved it to be a shrine, roughly two foot in height, with a meditating Naruto holding a bowl of ramen, held aloft by four orange and black toads who faced in the cardinal directions.

Hinata turned to Tsunade, who was warily eyeing the throng, and said, "I have one of these in my apartment, only he's being supported by eight clones who are in his Uzumaki Rendan poses. I really miss him, Tsunade-sama."

Then one of the braver souls asked softly, "You have one of his shrines?"

Hinata nodded politely while smiling wistfully. "Two, actually."

The speaker turned back to her compatriots who were involved in a hurried and whispered debate. She turned back to Hinata and bowed her head. "I am Utukisha Miko, Maelstrom Maiden, as are my sisters behind me. We are the bearers of Naruto-sama's Horde."


	6. Birth of a Legacy

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

It had been a very long week for Konoha's Information Specialists. They poured over recovered logs, printouts, reports, medical charts and archived records. Trusted ANBU Recovery teams located chakra powered canisters which contained Uzumaki's genetic material in sub-zero stasis. They also found Haruno Sakura's personal journal hidden by a triple layer Genjutsu protected by multiple paralysis seals and one special chakra seal.

That particular seal would have acted as a detonator for the explosive notes on primary and secondary structural supports, as well as igniting the insulated magnesium and sodium lines buried within the walls and embedded in each bookshelf for near complete data destruction. Shizune had been recalled from Wave and was assisting Tsunade and Hinata in going through the medical charts and personnel records.

They found that every candidate had to pass certain criteria, one of the foremost being non-clan or Shinobi family. The Elders had wanted first generation kunoichi, or those without an entrenched familial support structure, in addition to single civilian women between eighteen and twenty-six who showed high mental and physical aptitude and domestic qualities. The Elders had found records of what Orochimaru had intended for Naruto, which was the genesis for this project: Kyuubi-fied Shinobi under Council control.

If they had wanted 'just' access to the Namikaze holdings, the Elders would have bred only a few children, to ensure viability and selection, acquired the estates, and disposed of the evidence. However, if the power of the Kyuubi-modified DNA could be harvested and used en masse...they would have been fools to have passed up that opportunity. This batch was the initial test run, with following batches in three year increments to maximize instruction, indoctrination and integration.

Within five years, if the supposed bloodline proved truly potent, Konoha could field a force of thousands of easily replaceable ninja with rapid healing, massive chakra reserves, and heightened senses. They were planning on seizing the Namikaze estates regardless, to both enrich themselves and to fund this project secretly, and if they managed to create a small army loyal to them alone, the Elders might have been willing to portion out some of the Namikaze and Uzumaki clan techniques. With such power behind the Elders, their individual family lines would rule Fire, then embark on a systematic conquest of all the Elemental lands, culminating with campaigns across the Western Mountains, the Southern Jungles and the Eastern Seas.

There was one piece of information which Tsunade most wanted but could not be found: the location of Naruto. The only indications were brief notations found that he was being held somewhere within the city walls, mentioned in passing. There would be a journal entry from Horuma that he and Koharu had visited several council members in the Tower before going somewhere to check on the 'Kyuubi child'. Armed with this knowledge, Tsunade organized a portion of the integrated Shinobi force to begin searching, beginning at the outer walls and moving inward to the Tower, thereby creating a type of cordon should some group or person attempt to move the captive Naruto out of the village. Then she summoned Jiraiya.

When he arrived, she did not attack, did not scream, did nothing except to hand him a sheaf of papers.

"Explain."

What Jiraiya did next shocked her out of her barely contained anger. He knelt and touched his forehead to the floor.

"Tsunade-sama, Hokage-sama, Hime, Beloved, I knew he was alive and is still, but I knew not in what state. I could not in good conscious raise your hopes that he was well, only to find him a vegetable or worse. Please understand and forgive an old fool who sought to shelter you from undue pain."

Barely maintaining her composure, she softly asked, "Can you show me?"

He rose up into a kneeling position and sped through seals, and with a murmur and smear of blood, an eight-foot toad scribe was in her office, who in turn handed Jiraiya a large scroll.

"It is in here, Tsunade-hime, within the Toad Summoning Contract. His name is still red." That having been said, he unrolled the scroll so she could see for herself.

It was Jiraiya's turn to be shocked, as Tsunade went to knee before him and hugged him tightly.

"He's somewhere in the village, Jiraiya. And there's something else which you really need to see. Come, I will show you."

Partly numbed and very surprised that he had not received any sort of physical reprisal, he followed her to the old Uchiha sector and found himself before a wooden wall at one end of it.

"Within here, Jiraiya. Hinata and Shizune are already inside offering assistance and medical care. Naruto was like a son to me, and more like a grandson to you." She led him through the gate where he saw hundreds of pregnant women, not just 'glowing' but also squirming, moaning, clutching their thighs, rubbing their breasts and screaming out a name.

In the background of 'Naruto-sama!' Tsunade turned to the shell-shocked super pervert, smiled wide, and said, "All of these women have been artificially inseminated, with Naruto as the host-father. Congratulations, Jiraiya. You're going to be a great-grandfather to a bouncing baby horde."

Jiraiya, with teary eyes, looked around at the many swelled bellies and rubbed nipples, and right before he fainted from perversion overload, he managed to shout out proudly, "That's my boy!"

* * *

Hinata was conflicted. She was going on sixteen, was the Left Hand of the Hokage, had gained emancipation from the Hyuuga Clan (though she still gave support to Hanabi, the Hyuuga Heiress) without being sealed. had single-handedly changed the power structure in Lightning and was responsible for the modernization of the Wave medical infrastructure.

She had come so far and gained so much, but what she wanted, what she really wanted still eluded her. She wanted her Naruto-kun, she wanted to share his name and bear his children. He was still missing, with the extra kicker of Hinata tending to unknown women who were bearing his child instead of her! After all she had done to defend his name and spread word of his deeds...it was so unfair!

But then word was received from the Recovery teams that they had found Naruto's frozen samples and Hinata's mind had been racing. She glanced down at Jiraiya, who was being treated for a mild concussion after his proclamation and fainting, then over at her mentor, master and Hokage.

"Tsunade-sama?"

"Hinata, what is it?"

"I...I have a request, Hokage-sama. I...if...since Naruto-kun's samples have been located and secured, I was wonder if it might be possible to..."

"Hinata, stop. Are you requesting insemination?"

"Hai, Hokage-sama. I know Naruto-kun will be found eventually, but by that time it may be too late for me. I could be dead or too old to carry his seed. Please, Hokage-sama, please allow me to raise our son."

"Hinata, you are like a daughter to me, but that has to be one of the most off-the-wall things I have ever heard."

"Um...Hokage-sama?"

Tsunade turned to the woman who spoke. "Yes, um..."

"Kura, Hokage-sama."

"Kura-san, how may I help you."

"We...we wouldn't mind, Hokage-sama. If she wants to join us, that is. We couldn't really deny the intense pleasure which comes by serving Naruto-sama to anyone. I think I can speak for all of us here, Hokage-sama, when I say if we could carry another child for Naruto-sama, we would." There was a loud chorus of 'Hai!' and 'Naruto-sama!' from behind her.

Tsunade was stunned. "Is what most of you seem to be going through, this 'pleasure'?"

"Hai, Hokage-sama. Every single day since conception, we all reach climax, some of us upwards of nine or ten times daily. We do nothing; it just builds and builds and the pleasure increases until it's hard to breathe and think and BOOM! And then the cycle begins again. We've been in training these past six months to increase our chances not just reaching this state, but riding through it on the cusp of consciousness. There's really no words to describe this; it is something which must be experienced."

"When you say climax, what exactly do you mean?"

"Full blown toe-knuckle popping, Hokage-sama, several times a day."

Tsunade let out a low whistle, and for the first time in her life, wished she was the age she looked. She turned to a blushing, bright-eyed and very much pleading Hinata.

"Command me, Hokage-sama! I will do anything!"

"Anything? So, if I asked you to model for Jiraiya..." Hinata had already shucked her Jounin vest and zip-top, and had her armored mesh undershirt past her navel.

"Stop, I believe you." Tsunade looked down, then up, quickly organizing her thoughts. "Very well, Hinata, I do have something you can do for me. Neutralize Danzou, with Root being optional, and I will allow you to join this...experience; Intelligence has discovered some treasonous doings of his, and I don't want him to escape, not to mention that should Root continue, they will do all in their power to capture or kill these children. Do this for me and for them, and after the children are delivered, we will discuss this further. You will have my word, however, that you will be allowed to carry, for you have done so much for this Village and for Naruto's legacy."

"It will be as you command, Hokage-sama." With that, Hinata flickered away.

Several hours later, at the bottom of the old observation tower which had turned into the Root headquarters, Danzou was found under a pile of Root soldiers, all of whom appeared to have fallen from the highest catwalk in the mostly hollow shaft. Investigators would later call it a mass suicide, as there were no indications found, during the autopsy of Danzou or the three hundred and eighteen other bodies, to suggest foul play. There were no stab or puncture wounds, no poisons, no toxins, nor any indications of Ninjutsu usage; just mangled internal organs in keeping with a ten-story free-fall plummet onto very dense reinforced concrete.

From the recovered files and papers, it became known that Danzou and his Root program had not only been trying to actively overthrow the Village, but had also formed into a cult. It was rather well documented within the Shinobi ranks how difficult it was to deprogram a Root operative, and from the recovered records, it would seem they had been on the verge of a successful demonic summoning, the plan being to unleash the monster on the citizenry before dispelling it for their own glory and edification, thereby assuring allegiance and civil popularity.

One of the more ludicrous but most believed tales of Danzou's demise was that he had simply fallen from one of the highest catwalks, his physical maladies being his badges of honor, and the Root members, being programmed to serve and protect Danzou, leapt after him in an attempt to save their master, much like how lemmings charge off sea cliffs.

In the wake of his death, the Civilian Council had lost a sizeable portion of their political power. Danzou and the Elder Councilors were dead, and they were the ones with the clout and power to overrule the Hokage, as the Shinobi Council generally sided with Tsunade.

Haruno Yurinoki was able to retain her power base in the Civilian Council, however, deftly manipulating Sakura's death to her own political benefit as well as gaining possession of Uchiha Sasuke's properties and holdings. Despite maneuverings, she failed to acquire the Uchiha sector as that had been sold to the village by Sasuke for a rather lucrative sum, with which he had supported his luxurious lifestyle.

* * *

In the weeks which followed Danzo's death, plans were made to evacuate the Medical Quarantine Ward during the Council's confusion and consolidation. The Hokage and her apprentices knew that within a few months, if not sooner, word would leak out about the Horde even before they were born. And that word would reach non-friendly countries, like Earth and groups like Akatsuki.

Tsunade knew that once the children's parentage was discovered, as it would be, many villagers would risk their own lives to profit through capturing the infants and trading them on Black Market. For the past several years she had witnessed the Hokage Festival, known internally as the Kyuubi Defeat, where there would be music, food, games, skits depicting the Fourth defeating the Kyuubi, and sculptures made from layers of molded paper and glue on wire frames of both Naruto and Kyuubi.

They would be hung by their necks and beaten with sticks until their bodies split open, spilling candies for the children. It was a reminder of stories she learned from Hinata, of parents rewarding their children for hurting Naruto. She knew the Village would not be kindly disposed to his offspring, nor the mothers.

So it was that during the very early morning hours, Team Eight participated in an escort mission. It was an exodus of sorts, with a mass of pregnant women and willing family members filing past the Southern Gate guards who officially saw nothing as the parade of thousands quietly streamed out of the Village and began the journey to Wave. Tsunade and Jiraiya would accompany them, with Jiraiya's Toad summons providing extra security, up until the Great Naruto Bridge.

Jiraiya would split from the group at that point to meet with his contacts along the southern Fire border with Sand and River. Tsunade was to continue on to Wave with the group, with Shizune acting in an official capacity back in Konoha. After two weeks of very slow travel, with Kiba and Shino being very rattled by the sheer amount of pheromones and sexual scents emanating from the pregnant women, the group met Iruka at the bridge. Jiraiya said his goodbyes and headed south, while the group with Iruka continued east.

Iruka had been briefed by Tsunade through avian messaging, and had created impromptu but sturdy quarters for the masses. All of Wave had turned out to meet the procession, with many of the women being taken in by private homes for the remainder of their pregnancies. The family members which had come along from Konoha found eager hands willing to help them rebuild their lives in Wave, or to have a second home there.

It had been decided that the children would be raised in Wave, on the stipulation that Tsunade was their Godmother, and taught by Iruka and his chosen assistants. For Iruka, this was part of a dream come true, as he had considered Naruto as a son and had looked forward to the day he could teach the boy's own children. This had also caused a lot of fainting from the Umino Clan, as within another few months they would be grandparents many times over.

* * *

On October 10, while Konoha was celebrating the defeat of the Kyuubi, one thousand and twenty-four expectant mothers were giving birth in Wave. The births started just after midnight and would continue throughout the day, ending just before midnight. The cries of the newborns and shouts of 'Naruto-sama!' were the precursors to a week long celebration, welcoming the Golden Horde into the world. They were so named since every child was male, blonde and blue-eyed, reminding the residents of another blue-eyed blonde who had helped save and assist their village three years prior with another Golden Horde. Though there were some slight facial differences, those who knew Uzumaki Naruto could see his genetic stamp on every face. Though lacking whiskers, they were his.

For the willing mothers and Hinata, there would be one more insemination period the following year, to grant the new mothers time for their bodies to recover. Any remaining genetic material in storage would be destroyed at that point. For Hinata and company, they began counting down days.

October 10 was not without sorrow, as word was delivered to Tsunade in Wave and Shizune in Konoha that Jiraiya, the Toad Sage, had been killed by the remnants of Akatsuki while investigating leads in Rain. Before Konoha could organize an expedition, Wind was already in motion in the forms of the Sand Siblings.

Gaara had already removed several of the Akatsuki members over the prior months due to their improperly answering his question about Naruto. On the field, he was _the_ vanguard, sending battalions of combined blood-sand clones, which ripped through Pein's possessed souls while Temari literally tore Konan a new one. Konan's origami based techniques never stood a chance in the face of Temari's rage fueled wind attacks from the pain they caused her little brother.

Kankuro, the outspoken perverted one, took vindicated pleasure at re-animating former Akatsuki members with his potent chakra string variation, which allowed him temporary control of their personal style, chakra pool and bloodline so long as the bodies were no more than fifteen minutes old, and allowed for control for several hours. The downside was that the technique would irrevocably burn out the target's chakra coils, irrespective of time used, rendering them completely useless later as proper human puppets.

Pein's look of abject loss, betrayal and confusion when he faced Konan, his childhood friend and secret crush, under Kankuro's control gave them all a warm feeling for many decades to come. It became almost a favorite of his during dinner parties as part of an ice-breaker, where he would act out the scene, complete with henged sand clones courtesy of Gaara, for when Konan flashed Pein and his multiple possessed bodies.

Gaara personally brought Jiraiya corpse back to Konoha, where he was interred in a shrine befitting his stature, created by Gaara out of deep earth granite. At Tsunade's request, the Sand Sibs traveled to Wave and saw first hand the Golden Horde, the intense blue eyes of the swarm focused intently on Gaara, tracking him as he nervously approached, before peals of gurgled laughter split the air. Gaara was officially made an uncle by infantile decree.

It was after they returned to Hidden Sand that one of their older councilors stated that Gaara could be the next Kage, if he wanted to be. Though it was delivered in a rather pointed, snarky, uncharacteristically and ultimately gritty jelly fashion, it did make Gaara think and ponder. What would his other brother do?

* * *

Naruto was once again in his mind space, deep in meditation.

**"Kit, awaken."**

"Kyuubi-sama, what is it?"

**"Listen, it is stronger now. Something quickens."**

Together the two prisoners heard it: strong heartbeats and flashes of color, hints of sensations. Though they still did not know what it could be, they would continue to listen and monitor. It wasn't as if they had anything else to do.


	7. Age of the Golden Horde

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

* * *

It had been three years, six since Naruto was first kidnapped by Orochimaru, and they had not yet located him. The cordon search was winding down, with only the Tower and the Administrative District remaining, places which were not used for imprisonment. As far as paperwork went, Tsunade's Intelligence Department had revealed the full scope of the Elders' deception and treachery. Of Naruto, his paper-trail went cold at his mock hearing, slipping through the cracks, or being forced through them, shortly after sentencing.

Tsunade knew he was in Konoha but had no records to prove it. Yes, she had reports from and on the Elders' movements, reports on genetic storage, reports on the testing and insemination, but nothing, not a damn thing to tell her where all those points started, where the genetic material was harvested.

Speaking of genetics, the swarm of grandchildren was staggering. The second and final batch had been birthed, once again on October 10 as the first batch turned two years of age. She was thankful she had gotten the women out of the village when she did, as once word got out of the mass of blue-eyed blonde boys that resembled Uzumaki Naruto, a good portion of the civilian population that knew about Naruto's host were calling for infanticide, demanding that their Hokage lead a contingent to Wave to exterminate that foul beast's seed before the taint spread throughout the Elemental Nations.

Then there was the population that knew about Naruto and actually admired him; they rose up in arms against his detractors, and kept Internal Security and ANBU very busy, especially on weekends and during the Kyuubi Festival. Frankly, she was getting very tired of it all and was simply waiting for Konohamaru to get a little bit older and experienced. She was half tempted just to name him as successor, appoint Ebisu as the Interim Hokage until Konohamaru was ready to be the Sixth, and be done with it. She had a Horde of grandbabies to spoil, after all, and some things just took priority over others.

Then something caught her eye. "What's this? 'Inmate C-258-B3, charged with desertion, dereliction of duty, insubordination, deadly assault on a Konoha shinobi, lethal interference with a search and rescue mission and gross negligence.' Why does that...where's that record! Shizune!"

Shizune bolted through the door. "Hai, Tsunade-sama?"

"Find that council record where they sentenced Naruto. I need to see the charges. Get another research team to scour the records for 'C-258-B3,' apparently an inmate codename."

"It shall be done immediately, Tsunade-sama. Oh, you have a couple of visitors waiting to see you. Shall I send them in?"

"Who.."

"Ganmama!"

Shizune could see Tsunade's face light up as she moved around the desk to hug her grandson as Hinata stepped into the office, her own son snuggled against her chest in a sling. The toddler snuggled into Tsunade, then paused, sniffing the air.

"He heya. Tou-san heeya!"

In a recently constructed open-air amphitheater, capable of seating three thousand, over a thousand blond toddlers were playing, when one looked up and shouted, "Won Ate Fife smells Tou-san!"

There was a roar in Wave.

* * *

It had been roughly a year since Naruto first made contact. For the months prior, there would be ghostly images, of a sort, barely on the edge of his mental vision. It was akin to a small hedge, rounding about them, hazy and indistinct. At Kyuubi's recommendation, Naruto opened his mind to this haze, the both of them being absolutely gob-smacked when a thousand chibi Narutos blurred into existence. They looked at each other, then at the them and the air reverberated with, "TOU-SAN!"

Even before this experience, Naruto and Kyuubi had felt them, felt their emotions, and what was washing over Naruto now he had only felt once before in his life, or maybe in a previous life, once upon a time in Wave: adulation.

**"Now you know how Gods feel, kit."**

"These...these are mine? The pump..."

**"So it would appear, kit. You have disciples, now how will you mold them?"**

"Not disciples to mold, Kyuubi-sama, but sons to shape."

Naruto had told them of himself, who he was, what he was, where he was, and how that came to be. They soaked up his stories with wide awestruck eyes, for here was Naruto-sama, Tou-san, their Hero and Idol. He had learned that though they were named, amongst themselves they used a numbering system, with 'Oh' for the number zero up until a thousand, where the zeros became 'Aught,' as in One Aught Two One for 1021.

There were 1024 of the little buggers, which made Naruto's eyes widen when first told. He almost fainted when he learned the Horde's kaa-sans were making brothers, same as them, which would push it to 2048. He did faint when the tally became 2049 and the Horde chattered eagerly about one not numbered, but called Little Brother.

**"Kit, awaken. One is near, very near."**

"Hai, Kyuubi-sama," Naruto said before pausing, "One Eight Five is here. We should not get our hopes up, Kyuubi-sama, for we do not truly know where we are kept."

**"Indeed, and you have grown wise, kit. Return to your meditating. I will monitor and observe."**

* * *

Tsunade, Shizune and Hinata were frozen in shock. Hinata was the first to break out of it when she felt movement from the sling across her chest, where she saw her own son, blonde with gray eyes, awaken and give a huge toothless grin before gurgling happily.

"See? Weeta Brotta noz. He noz Tou-san heeya too! Ganmama, we fine, we fine Tou-san now!"

"Mizu-chan, can...can you really tell where Tou-san is?" asked Hinata.

"Hai!" He took an exaggerated sniff before his eyes turned downwards.

"It's okay if you can't, Mizu-chan. There's no reason to be upset."

"Not up..up..."

"Upset?"

"Hai, not dat. Tou-san down dere!" He pointed at the floor, and Tsunade's eyes went wide.

"Impossible! There's nothing below us but offices and storage rooms," stated Tsunade, trying to control her breathing. "Could it be, Shizune?"

"That would be a cruelty, Tsunade-sama, for him to been missing all this time right below our feet."

Tsunade turned to her grandson. "Mizu-chan, do you think if we go with you that you could find him better? We could go for a walk in the Tower. Would you like that?" She felt a pang in her heart when his bright smile reminded her so much of Naruto. "Up you come then, Mizu-chan. Let's go find Tou-san."

"Hai! Won Ate Fife iz onna job!"

Tsunade cast a glance at Hinata who merely shrugged before turning back to Shizune. "Get on those tasks, Shizune. If we find anything, you'll hear the shouts."

"Hai, Tsunade-sama."

* * *

They found themselves not that far below the Hokage's Office in a curved stone hallway, the walls of which helped serve as structural support. One noted feature of this hallway was a door with two ANBU guards stationed outside of it.

"Hokage-sama!" They both went to a knee.

"Otter and Hawk, report. What is behind this door and why was I not informed anything was being guarded here?"

The two guards looked at each other before one drew a scroll from his kunai pouch, handing it to Tsunade.

'Ah, so this is where they kept C-258-B3?' "Under who's authority was this done? I do not recall ever signing anything like this, but my signature is still on this document!"

"The Elders gave it to us, Hokage-sama, stating the unorthodox nature was due to the sensitivity of the prisoner and the fact that you were away on official business. We don't know who the prisoner is, just that the prisoner is male with blonde hair."

"I see. Otter, stay with me. Hawk, report to Shizune-san in my office and give your full assistance in anything she requires. Now open this damned door!"

* * *

**"Kit, awaken. Someone draws near."**

* * *

She could feel it when she walked in, as could Hinata, the slightly chilly sensation from the seals lining the walls, floor and ceiling, siphoning off chakra to power themselves and closing off access to reserve pools. There, in front of them, was a man, strapped to a type of spa table. He was completely hooded, with a strap even under his jaw, but that did not stop the blonde hair from spilling out from under it, flowing down to the backs of his knees. His only clothing was a leather and cloth apron, or modesty panel, which went to his knees in the front; his only other feature was a scar, just one, of a slightly puckered circle under his right collarbone, ringed around by fern-like patterns.

Though they both could feel their chakra being sealed and sucked away, they could still sense the chakra aura leaking from the bound man. They both knew the feel of that chakra too well.

"Na...Naruto, is that you? It's me, Tsunade...baa-chan. Do you remember me?" She saw his head raise up and slowly nod. "We've been looking for you for six years, my dear Naruto! Otter! Release him at once and be very careful with that hood. It's been too long since he's seen light."

Naruto felt the straps binding his fingers and wrists come undone, his jaw strap unlocked, followed shortly be the rest of his bodily restraints and he felt himself falling, only to be supported on either side. He felt a sudden weight on his back and a happy nuzzle around his ear.

"Tou-san! We fon you!"

"One Eight Five?"

"Hai, Tou-san!"

* * *

There was another roar in Wave as blonde toddlers spread through the village spreading the news that Uzumaki Naruto had been found.

* * *

"Na..Naruto-kun, this is Hinata. You're going to be okay, Naruto-kun. We found you, we really found you! Tsunade-sama, we need to get him medical attention and then get him to Wave."

"I agree. Otter, clear a path for us, and don't worry. You did not know you were guarding my son."

"Hai...hai, Hokage-sama."

The motley crew made it back to the Hokage's Office, where Tsunade had Otter close all the curtains to dim the room. "Naruto, I'm going to remove your hood now. Try to keep your eyes closed and open them slowly. We've dimmed the lights in here as much as we can, and you have two medics standing by in case you need anything."

He nodded dumbly, still shocked at how fast things were going, and that he was no longer imprisoned. He felt the hood get unbuckled and removed and he slowly began to blink his eyes, having not seen anything in six very long years. As his vision cleared, the healing transition boosted by a demon fox who was also eager to 'see' once again, the first thing he saw was a baby, with blonde hair and large gray eyes staring back at him.

The baby cocked its head to the side and began gurgling happily, flapping his arms into his lap. Holding him was Hinata, tears streaming from her eyes. She leaned forward and kissed his forehead and gently said, "Welcome back, Naruto-kun. You have been sorely missed."

* * *

A lot had happened within a week's time. Ebisu was now the Interim Hokage, standing in for Konohamaru until he was ready to wear the robes. Konohamaru was in Wave, alongside Kiba and Shino. Tsunade, now retired, had moved to Wave to be closer to her extended family, and Shizune followed behind with Ton-Ton to keep her out of trouble. The Sand Sibs had traveled were there as well, along with the entirety of Wave, all to meet Naruto at the Great Naruto Bridge. At his side was Hinata (retired) carrying Nisake while he toted Mizu.

In the center of the village, in the shadow of a monument to Naruto, there was a homecoming, the first Naruto had ever experienced. It was a time for tears and rejoicing, stories and explanations. The only bitter part was the impotent anger that all who had done such horrible things to him were already dead, and not by his own hands.

Such a feeling quickly withered away upon seeing over a thousand sons shouting 'Tou-san' and 'Unka Gaara,' with another thousand sons looking at him intensely, carried by another thousand women who shocked him with looks of pure adoration and devotion while shouting 'Naruto-sama!' If Hinata hadn't had one arm and Iruka the other, he might well have bolted at such an alien sensation.

Here, here was family, the family he had always wanted and dreamed about, here in spades. And with two thousand sons, it would only get bigger.

* * *

In the fullness of time, the Golden Horde made their mark upon the world, when once more Water attempted to invade Wave a decade later. Under the direction of Iruka-sensei, Hinata-sempai and her assistant Yugito, the children were thoroughly educated and formed into four-man squads: three and a medic, with the three knowing basic field medicine and the medic having gone through Tsunade's Boot Camp.

Wave had caught wind of the upcoming attack, and had staged a preemptive maneuver, splitting the Horde into an army led by Naruto and Little Brother, and a navy led by Iruka and Inari. They island hopped, with Iruka's forces laying waste to naval traffic and shipping, forming a blockade while the army disembarked on a nearby island and wave-ran to the main isle of Water.

Once there, the thousand-man Horde lined up in groups of a hundred and created ten Shadow clones each. Those ten thousand fired off long range attacks and moved forward as another ten thousand clones came behind. The first group then fired off mid-range attacks as the second made long-range ones, before they each moved forward. A third group of ten thousand clones then took up the long-range position as the second gave mid-range support and the first engaged in close combat.

Whenever the first group thinned due to damage or chakra usage, the ranks would progress with another group of ten thousand taking the empty rear slot. The remaining twenty-four originals in the army ran back and forth, providing logistical support and medical care, ensuring every Horde member was in good condition. Since each Hordling only created ten clones at a time, there was very little taxation on their reserves, even after hours of repetition.

The same could not be said of the Water forces, especially when the naval contingent came ashore in a flanking maneuver, again employing the same clone army tactic. Water fought a losing war of attrition with a sixty thousand strong army, maintained by two thousand highly trained Wave shinobi. Within seven hours, Water became a province of Wave, Wave having become emancipated some five years prior by decree of the Sixth Hokage, Konohamaru.

Lightning was prompt in requesting new trade and peace agreements due to this massive show of force, an act which led to many decades of peace and prosperity for the mountainous country. The same could not be said of Earth who tried their own form of preemption and attacked Fire. The Fire forces, augmented by the Daimyo's personal samurai army, drove Earth back to the border but could progress no further until the Golden Horde arrived as a personal favor to the Sixth Hokage.

Again, they employed their clone army, only this time each Hordling made one hundred clones. The Earth ranks faltered and crumbled as a blonde two hundred thousand man army swept over them, blazing a trail towards Rock. The Fire/Konoha forces followed close in their wake, through the stormed gates and into the city. Naruto, in an act of goodwill to his own 'Little Brother' allowed Konohamaru the killing blow which felled the Tsuchikage.

* * *

Naruto had fully merged with Kyuubi during the Horde's shinobi training, they having formed a strong rapport during the prior isolation. Kyuubi was far from dead, however, as Naruto was able to adjust the seal just enough to allow for a mental partition, a place for Kyuubi's spirit to be free of the Shinigami's gullet. In addition, Naruto essentially stopped aging around age twenty-five. He would still age, but very slowly, with Kyuubi anticipating his life-span in the hundreds of years. Due to Kyuubi's influence on his genetics, his own sons would have significantly longer lives as well, their sons slightly less, and _their_ sons about ten to fifteen years above average.

It was the Age of the Golden Horde.

* * *

**The End**


	8. Bonus Chapter

Disclaimer: Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi.

Author's Note: Bonus scene for Meatmanz2 and Blaine2. Enjoy!

* * *

Naruto stood with Nisake, Little Brother of the Horde, as they watched the Water forces arrange themselves in battle lines in the distance. He glanced over to the side, where an old friend stood, one remembered from childhood.

"Shino...not to be rude or anything, but, um, what the hell are you doing?"

"Girding my loins."

"Shino, Shino, Shino...there are no massive cats here."

"Loins, not lions," Shino stated flatly, a single elegantly sculpted eyebrow risen. "There are times when your definition of 'logic' exceeds all paradigms."

"Do what?"

"Perhaps we should begin and save this...mental juggling for a more suited time."

"Yeah, yeah. Glad you could make it though, Shino. Kiba's gonna be pissed he missed this, so be sure to rub it in very subtly. Nisake, you ready?"

"Believe It!"

Two thumbs went up. "That's my boy! Now kick some butt!"

"Hai! Third battalion, stations on the line, first wave advance and fire!" Three hundred Hordlings created ten Shadow Clones each, with each Shadow Clone pulling out a bow and a single arrow raised at a sixty degree angle.

"Second battalion, stations on the line, first wave advance and support!" Under Naruto's benevolent eye, three hundred Hordlings created ten Shadow Clones each, with each Shadow Clone running through the signs for Great Wind Breakthrough. "First battalion, stations on the line, first wave advance and prepare to fire!" Three hundred Hordlings created ten Shadow Clones each, with each Shadow Clone pulling out a bow and a single arrow raised at a sixty degree angle.

"First Medical Support, stand by for orders." Twenty-four Hordling Medics arranged themselves, eight to a battalion. "First Logistical Support, stations on the line, first wave advance and calculate," intoned Shino dryly as one hundred Hordlings created ten Shadow Clones each, with each Shadow Clone arming themselves with Field Grade slide-rulers, the click-clacking reminding some of locust mating season. Well, reminding one, at any rate.

"Shino, what the he.."

"First Logistical Support, let slip the Hounds of Logic!"

"For Logic!" came the massive battle cry. "Bearing Oh Two Niner, Vector Ate Oh Seben, Declination Zod!"

"Hai!"

Naruto glanced about him at the seeming peace and tranquility. "Shino, old friend, if you would."

"I thought you would never ask." From out of Shino's battle robe flowed a dark swarm of buzzing insects. He raised his hands and brought them down sharply before bringing them up again, weaving his fingers to and fro. The Swarm obeyed, and the opening score of Wagner's 'Flight of the Valkyries' wound out upon the battlefield.

"Fire."

The sky turned black as the unleashed arrows became many with a cry of Mass Shadow Arrowshot, followed by Great Wind Breakthrough. The wall of silvered wood sped toward the waiting ranks with hurricane strength, puncturing through wooden and earthen defenses like paper, the streamers of liquid crimson granting counterpoise.

"First ranks advance and prepare mid-range support, First, Second and Third battalions, stations on the line, second wave advance and provide long range support!"

"Hai!" The first rank prepared kunais with explosive and gas deployment notes, as the second rank took up their positions, readying arrows and the Breakthrough technique. When the arrows fired, the kunais were thrown with a shout of Mass Shadow Kunai, the Breakthrough catching both attacks and hurling it at the disheveled ranks, still trying to come to terms with the initial onslaught. Gouts of fire from igniting gas pockets split the battlefield among the cries of the wounded and dying.

"First ranks advance, close quarters! Second rank advance and provide mid-range support! First, Second and Third battalions, stations on the line, third wave advance and provide long range support!"

"First Medical Support, provide medical support to the battalions. First Logistical Support, provide battlefield analysis. Swarm, continue," said Shino calmly.

"Hai!" The First Medical moved through the battalions, checking vitals and chakra levels, before returning to their duty stations. By now, the first line had reached the remains of the front ranks, and threw themselves forward with Suicide Clones, Gas Detonation Clones, and Crazy-Naruto-Fu Taijutsu. As the first rank was thinned by termination, destruction or chakra expenditure, the next rank would move into position, and for the next seven hours, this portion of the front would maintain thirty thousand on the field, with another thousand in reserve.

But that wasn't all. Naruto's pride at seeing his sons in action quickly bled over to them from their mental links to Tou-san, which made their clones more durable and eager to please. So it was that many a Water shinobi, samurai and militiaman met their end gazing into the eyes of a grinning Horde.


End file.
